A Court Of Fire And Pain

I love you too

Chapter 46 Fenrys:
After he left I thought a lot about what Azriel said. It made sense. But looking back at everything that had happened since we met, I realized there was nothing new.
I just hadn't realized it before. But now... I felt guilty. Like I should still be depressed about Connall. But with everything that Azriel was doing for me, I wasn't.
I wanted to talk to him again, but it seemed like he was avoiding me.
So I just didn't sleep so I could catch him.
We sat in silence for a bit after that.
I finally gathered enough courage to speak. "So I've been thinking about it."
He looked away.
"I... I want to be with you. And it's totally fine if you don't want that because you don't like me that way, but if it's because of some stupid reason like you're worried about me then I won't accept it."
I held my breath as he looked back at me. What was he gonna say now? Should I have said that?
"I- um.. you can think about it if you'd like. No need to make decisions now. Just uhhhh-"
He cut me off with a kiss.
Oh wow. So this was happening. Obviously I kissed him back.
We finally had to pull away for air, and he smiled. "You don't know how long I've wanted to do that."
I laughed and pulled him into another kiss.
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The next day I didn't know what to do. Was it right to have done that? Be together? Oh gods.
When Azriel came in he looked happier than I'd seen him before, but I avoided looking at him. He seemed to notice this.
"Hey, listen. I can pretend nothing happened. We just talked, if that's what you want."
I made myself look him in the eye.
"That's not it."
He raised an eyebrow. "Okay, then what's wrong?"
"I'm not a good person. You could do so much better! You don't need..." I pointed at myself. "You don't need this."
His eyes narrowed. "I don't think it's up to you to decide what I need. And you are not a bad person."
I shook my head. "But I am. I've done so many things I regret. So many things to please Maeve. Before Connall died the first time, I was like a completely different person."
Azriel took my hand. "That may be true. But I don't know that person, I know the Fenrys right in front of me. And he is a good person. We've all done things we regret."
He had a point, but...
He sensed I was going to speak and put his finger over my lips to shush me.
"Listen, it's like you said yesterday. I'm fine with you wanting to stop this if that's what you want, but not because you think you're doing it for me. I want this, and you do to. Let's just leave it at that."
I nodded and smiled sheepishly. "I guess you're right. I'm just new to this. I've... never been in an actual relationship before."
This time both eyebrows raised. "Really? All those years looking like this and you haven't...?"
I blushed and ducked my head. "Well I've been with people obviously. But not for a long period of time. I haven't started anything I hoped would last."
"Oh. That makes sense." Then he grinned. "So this is gonna go on for a long period of time huh. I thought I was just going to be one of your one night stands."
I threw the pillow at his face. "Shut up."
He threw it back, but lightly.
"Excuse me I don't need your pity!" I threw it back with more force, and this time he responded the same.
This went on until the pillow decide to give up and explode.

And now they're together! Let them be happy!
Only one more short chapter left!