Maybe

Chapter 36 For Me

-This chapter May contain suicidal stuff if you are not easy with it please skip it-

It was useless to think of him being a better person..at the end it’s only me who got the pain..

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I wasn’t expecting mom to stand outside and wait for me..i try to ignore and walk away but i heard her, "Who do you think you are?! Mind to ask me before you take the key?? Do you have ANY IDEA how important it was and how badly wr could've lose just everything? How can you be so childish? When are you going to grow up!!"

I keep walking and walking till Iam inside my room but before i could even close the door she stepped and slammed it infront of my face. "Iam talking to YOU NINA"

"Iam not DEAF!" i Didn't know how my voice up like that. "I wish i was never born!" i screamed right infront of her. I Didn't feel anything but about Aiden,Ethan and my Father Everything was tearing me Apart at the moment.

They are all like that because of me! I want to die so the torture will be less than me being born. No matter how hard i thought this kept coming in my mind.i can't stop myself from thinking that I'm the problem.All the things,memories, feelings, everything reminds me that J caused it.

"Nina!"

"Do you think i can't do anything?i can't handle anything? I've lived alone for a long time Didn't you thought of me being kidnapped or raped that time? Rules,Rules,Rules,My Ass! I hate you, I hate dad, I hate Ethan, I hate Aiden, I hate everyone! I Hate ME! " tears started falling.i can't stop them. I think Ethan hates me that his whole happy family got ruined because of Me.Now,I hate myself too.

I wipe my tears and walk into bathroom and lock myself saying "leave me alone!"

After a while i heard the door opening and closing understanding that she did leave.

Fine.

Finally.

Oh God look what you did Aiden.I really cared for you. A person who killed his Father for me,tortured his mother for me,hates his brother for me,even tried to kill his sister for me,wanted to kill my mother as well for me..

For me, for me, for me, for me.. Everything for me!

Then fine i Will do it my self enough for them.i wipe my tears and start to search for something. I Don't know what my hand was searching for but it stopped when it found a Blade..

I sit at the bathtub counter.i pull it closer to my wrist and someine knocked on my door.my whole body flinches through my skin. "Mom iam taking bath,please leave " my voice was weak and trembling, sensing that i might tried to control my tears.i turn in the water and Whoever was at the door Left.

Come on help me end this torture devil.is the only thing came in my mind.i sit inside the bathtub and the water kept filling it.suddenly i wanted to drown under the ocean. I wanted to get and jump under the Ocean but nothing works fine.if i got out she would ask me again and as far i know she let me go out at this hour.they wouldn’t even that iam dead and the torture will keep going on.

           I bring the blade closer to my left hand's wrist and push it Against my skin. It hurts but in my skin but in my heart.i want to scream out of my lungs.my hand is trembling but i pull it anyway.

Blood..i see blood dripping.it falls at the water.the water is already at my shoulder now.My vision goes blurry.i Couldn't see clearly because of the tears already..

"This is The End. Sorry Mom,Sorry Dad"

I feel Light.i feel my head Light. My left hand fell into the Water. But i still saw my blood running out and slowly the bathtub turned red and red.tears fell down my cheeks. I couldn’t move the hand.It was already light and paralysed. If that's the word you’d use.

My whole vision went blurry and my head went under Water. Bubbles came out of my mouth and it felt Good.

Sorry Dad, Sorry Mom but that was for YOU.