Too young for war

chaper 16

«i'm going to visit our mother today." Aaron tells me as I'm still laying in my bed.

"and I'm not allowed to come, or could you at least consider to take me with you this time?" I ask a little irritated, remembering all the other times he tells me this.

he looks down before looking back up. "no, I'm not taking you with me. And you know why Elena, I'll be back soon. You are free to go see James if you want to."

"but—I do have the right to meet my own mother, even if I never had the relationship you had with her. It isn't fair Aaron, that you can see her when you feel like it, but I can't. She isn't only your mother!" I tell him, almost shouting as I get out of bed.

"Elena, stop. you are to staying at base while I visit her alone. I'm not reminding you why I'm not letting you visit, you know that already." He tells me as he walks over to the door.

"you only said she is sick—"

He takes a deep breath, and I'm not sure if I'm going to far, sometimes I feel like I am, but I do also have the right to meet my mother, and I have the right to ask and try to change his mind.

"eat your food, get dressed and you can ether stay here in your room, or you can leave to see James."

And he walks out.

He always act so different when he visit our mother, I'm guessing she is more sick that I am imagining.

But that does not change the fact that he is being unfair.

I'm not sure if I'm should go see James today, I'm too irritated and upset, and I feel like my day is ruined.

but a part of me also tells me I should go, James may be able to change my mood.

so, I do. I get dressed, eat a little of my food, and leave to go see James.

I'm still irritated, and I know now that everything is going to get on my nerves today—

I just told two soldiers to shut up.

they just looked at me weird, but I ignored it.

"Elena!" James call from the benches as I get out of the elevator. I wave trying my best to change my bad mood.

"hii!" I say smiling, but I can imagine it looks awkward.

he looks a little confused.

"are you okay Elena? You never usually say hi like that-"

I look down really trying not to look mean or answer rudely.

"I'm fine, really— I just— um—" I try to form out a good sentence.

"Aaron is just being unfair, and he is acting like an idiot." I tell him looking at the ground.

"he is a little confusing, but I'm sure he's not an idiot-"

"he is. but I don't want to talk about it," I tell him with a small smile,"can we talk about something else?"

"ok—" he says trying to find something we can do.

"did you bring a pen?" He ask.

"I have this from yesterday!" I tell him getting it from my back pockets.

"I got an idea on a new tattoo! I've gotten better at drawing after we have drawn in your sketch book, or at least I think I have?" He says smiling at the end.

"you have definitely gotten better." I smile.

.......

I'm back in my room. I was tired and needed space—so right now I am laying in my bed reading a French book.

What happened earlier today is really bothering me, I try to do something—anything that could make me think of something else, but it seems to be impossible at the moment.

I hear the door open, knowing who it is I tell him to go.

"go." I tell him, but he ignores me. Instead he takes a seat on the end of my bed. "I said, go-" I tell him again getting more irritated.

This is very unlike me, I usually never gets this angry and especially not at Aaron. I do feel bad, but I just can't get myself to stop.
"Elena." He says, sounding tired, more sad maybe?

"She's gone" he tells me without looking at me.

I freeze. Knowing who he is talking about I can't help but stay quiet for a moment.

I don't know what to say or think, I never got to meet her and now I'm not able to anymore.
I'm not sure how to react to this, I feel both upset and mad that Aaron never let me meet her. But that can't be my concerns now.

I have of course heard details about her from Aaron when I was younger,
So I know my mom wasn't like my father.

I throw my arms around him and hug him even though I'm still a little mad at him.

But I won't let go because I needed this and I think he did too. I'm sitting on his lap, my head laying on his shoulder while his hands are tightly around me.

"I'm sorry Aaron-"

sorry for the bad chapter🫣