Julianna Catching Fire

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

Spring Break was going by way too slow, much to my dismay.

I couldn't take it.

I wasn't on speaking terms with my "friends." I pushed away the one guy I had feelings for. This is not how things were supposed to go. Everything was all wrong.

I'd spent the last week doing nothing. Or rather I spent the last week drunk. It had become my specialty. It was the easiest way to deal with everything. It was the easiest way to cope.

Easy, easy, easy.

That's my new favourite word.

I wasted my time. I still wasting my time. I was wasting other people's time, as well as their feelings.

I was wasting away myself. I felt helpless, powerless, like I had somehow brought this all upon myself. But did I? Did I really?

I could have. I didn't make all the right decisions, but did I really ask for all this...misery of sorts? Did I ask Alex to come down here? Did I ask Blake to like me? Did I ask Sam to be a complete and total bitch? Did I ask Lauren to follow Sam like a puppy dog? Did I ask my dad to be a douche? No, I didn't ask for any of that. I didn't put a gun to any of their heads and make them do it either. But that's just how life works, I guess.

And to think, I was so ready - excited, even for Spring Break. And look how shitty it turned out to be! Isn't that just amazing? If only things turned out the way we wanted them to. But then, the world would be pretty boring, wouldn't it?

It was now Sunday, or early Monday morning actually, and I was leaving tomorrow afternoon.

Oh how time flies.

"Another drink, miss?" the bartender asked.

I lifted up my head off the counter slowly. I looked at the bartender but he wouldn't stop moving. He would be at one end of the bar then at the other end in less that five seconds. How did he do that? Was he superman?

I was going crazy. Maybe I just needed one more drink. You know, to clear my mind.

"Sure," I slurred. "Do you sell french fries?"

"Yes," he said, sliding me another shot.

I tossed it back. "Thanks, and do you sell burgers too?"

"Yes, we do."

"Great, can I have a burger and fries? No onions, extra pickles and ketchup. And an extra slice of cheese, too." I dug around in my purse, searching for my wallet. When I finally found it I slapped five one hundred dollar bills on the table.

He picked it up. "Thanks, your food it will be ready shortly."

I closed my eyes and hummed along to the music. 'Only Girl in The World' by Rihanna was currently playing. I swayed gently to the song. I knew I was off beat but I contined to dance anyway. Who was gonna stop me, the Dance Floor Police?

"One more dance!" a guy shouted, tapping me on my shower.

"Cale," I said warmly. "You said that ten minutes ago."

"I promise," he smiled. "Just one more dance and then we can go."

I rolled my eyes and waved him away. "Fine."

He hurried off excitedly, searching for another skank to grind with.

I just met Cale tonight. I was at the bar and I asked who wanted to do body shots. Naturally all the hands at the bar shot up but Cale's was the first one. And now, here we are. He told me after one more dance we'd go to his place...that was ten minutes ago. But hey, he can do whatever he wants. Who am I to talk?