Silence

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trigger warning : self-harm; mention of depression and blood ( If you don't want this type of story you may proceed to next chapter :> )

Listen to Silence while reading this :)

Niall and I are very close friends but ever since my bestfriend, Ashley appeared in picture she became more important to him. It was quick how the table turns. He suddenly never asked me again to come to his house like we used to before but when it comes to Ashley he's inviting her almost everyday. I started to think Niall is starting to like Ashley.

Never in my life thought that Ashley would still the one thing I have that makes me happy and feel safe. Until one day I decided to ignore them and act like I don't even know them. It is very hard on my part especially Niall is everything to me.

I come to school alone and they never ask me to join them. Ashley started ignoring me and I don't know what she told Niall. She probably manipulated him and made him start to ignore me.

Today is Friday, I am walking alone at the quiet hallway when I heard my name being called by someoen. "Y/N! Wait!" The familiar voice said. "What do you need Niall?" I asked getting irritated with him.

As much as I want to see him and get a long with him I can't anymore since everything has changed already. Thanks to Ashley. Haha.

"Have you seen Ashley today?" He asked. I shook my head. He sighed. I knew he is nervous by just looking at him right now in front of me. I furrowed my eyebrows trying to examine him.

"Why? Aren't you always together?" I bitterly asked. He immediately nodded his head. I nodded back. "Then why are you asking where is she?" I said. I wanted to kick myself because I have no idea why I keep talking to him instead of starting to walk away.

Maybe because I just missed him? I haven't able to talk to him for 9 months. I only see them together at the campus with some of their friends. "I have to tell her something but I'm nervous so I've been trying to ignore her since yesterday." He said.

Seriously Niall, do I really care about that? I don't fucking care about you two. I automatically knew you are going to ask her to be your girlfriend. I thought to myself.

"Oh! I see, well I apologize I haven't seen her but if I'm able to bump with her I'll tell her you are looking for her." I said then gave him a fake smile. I honestly want to roll my eyes on him right now.

Why do I expect something else? Why the fuck I keep hoping we would be back to where we were before. Stupid (Y/N). Stop it. That's not going to happen.

"I should probably get going." I said. I gave him another fake smile and started to walk away. He was actually about to respond back but he wasn't able to say it since I walked away.

I started thinking so many things, In the past 9 months so much was going on with me. Because of it, I learned to become Silence. Even in my house, myself, at school as well. When something started happening inside my home Niall has disappeared from my life already.

Clearly, He really don't know about anything that's is happening with me because I'm already forgotten. Niall is only my most trusted best friend and my comfort person. I do know Niall gets upset when it comes to mention of self-harm or hurting myself.

I used to do it before he came in my life. Ever since he showed up in my life he changed me. He helped me in many ways on how I can stop hurting myself. He taught me to look at the bright side, stop worrying about the people who give shits about me. But obviously that didn't lasts.

I didn't know where it went wrong. Why my family is starting to be broken and closed to falling apart. It became complicated. The atmosphere inside the house changed. It doesn't even called home anymore.

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