Our Secret (Austin Mahone Fanfiction)

Part 12

- Madison's point of view -

"And that's how we became best friends, crazy huh?" Austin softly spoke. We were sitting down on Sarah's front step exactly like we were about a week ago. I remember how we were both bored out of our minds with the party and ended up just sitting out here, well not for long actually considering we hopped into his car to go to Starbucks. It's crazy to think that just barely a week ago, so many things occurred in such a short period of time. So many. And I had a feeling that they weren't going to stop here either.

Anyway, after what happened with Cameron, I just needed to take some fresh air to clear my thoughts and Austin just happened to come with me which I really didn't mind.

"Yeah I mean over a pair of shoes? What's the coincidence!" I laughed, and laughed I did. I don't know what came over me but I couldn't stop myself from laughing. I guess all the stress that I had built up inside of me needed to be released and that was the only way I managed to do it, which I didn't mind because laughing wasn't all that bad. Austin eventually joined in making both of us look like complete idiots but I didn't care, I needed a good laugh and besides, no one was outside except for us of course.

It didn't take long after that before our laughing fit slowly dwindled down to basically nothing, making the silence of the cool night take over.

This sense of exhaustion suddenly went through my whole body as I felt myself become tired. I still couldn't get over what happened a few minutes ago, it was basically draining all of my energy away just to think about it. The simple fact that he did what he did crossed the line and I hope that I made it very clear to him because he needed to know, he needed to understand how I felt. And to think that all of this went down just because of a stupid and all too pointless game.

This wasn't supposed to happen.

Mentally slapping myself, I came back to reality and realized that I should stop thinking about the whole situation because I'm literally beating myself up over this, which I really shouldn't be. I need to let it go. After all, it was only a kiss, not the end of the world. So taking in a deep breath, I leaned my head against the railing of the stairs and slightly turned my head to the side as to now I was looking at Austin. His head was held high while he looked in the distance, the moon reflecting off of his already mentioned-- flawless skin. My gaze wandered around his figure for a few seconds before I came to realize yet something else: not only was he hot but he was also beautiful. He was the most beautiful thing I ever laid my eyes on and I, of all people, had gotten the chance to have him. It wasn't like we were in a relationship or anything but I had him and he had me, in multiples different ways.

The way his eyes shined when any form of light would hit them, the way his lips formed into the perfect pout and held that perfect shade of pink, the way his hair was always so soft and messy but it's the way he would smile that would make the world stop and stare. Everything was perfect, no other word then perfect. He was completely flawless from head to toe, literally.

"You like what you see?" He suddenly asked breaking me from my trance. In all honesty, I didn't even think that he was aware of my looking at him but I guess I was very wrong on that part. I just got so infatuated by his features that I totally zoned out.

"Shut up." I teased turning my head as to now I was looking directly in front of me.

"You didn't have to look away."

"Austin, you kind of ruined the moment." I knowingly said letting out a chuckle at the end. Besides, if I was to continue to look at him, my need for having him would've started to kick back in. As I already said, it didn't take much and as of right now, I was okay and I planned on keeping it that way.

To my surprise, he started to scoot over making his way right by my side, our legs inches apart. A breeze then pushed my hair back making me shiver at the sensation so I grabbed my hood and threw it over my head.

Good thing I wore a hoodie.

"Are you cold?" He asked. I shrugged my shoulders not wanting to tell him that I was beginning to get cold but before I could even do or say anything, he came wrapping his left arm around waist proceeding with doing the same with the right one but instead it went over my stomach as he held his other hand, completely engulfing me in this somewhat of a hug.

His daring actions surprised me but I didn't push him off I mean, why would I? His body was pressing against mine in a delicate matter while he rested his head on my right shoulder. It actually felt nice, really nice. I could hear him breathing at a steady pace just making me do the same considering how soothing and relaxing it was.

I can just imagine how adorable he looks right now, I thought.

So being left on that thought, I turned my head to take a quick peek at him but he beat me there as his lips came pressing themselves to my cheek. I giggled at how lame he was.

Maybe he was lame, but I loved it. He made me feel good and there was no way I could possibly deny it.

Pulling away, he just sat there looking at me as I was doing to him a few minutes prior, making a soft smile form onto my lips. I wasn't sure whether he was looking, admiring or simply just staring but I knew he had his eyes on me. And even though I wasn't looking back, it was more than obvious.

"I have a question," I said.

"Go ahead."

"Why do you always wear hats? Every time I see you, you're wearing one of those snapbacks."

His attention suddenly went somewhere else as he turned his head now looking down at the grown "I don't know- I guess I just don't like my hair." He answered.

I started to laugh not understanding what he was talking about; I loved his hair. He had the perfect shade of brown that blended in perfectly with his tanned skin, his small curls made him look irresistible not to mention how soft it was, there was absolutely nothing wrong about it. It suited him in every way possible but I guess he just didn't see that which was too bad because it really was adorable.

"Austin, you're crazy!" I said turning my head to face him while he did the same.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes I mean, why wouldn't you like your hair? It's perfect the way it is."

"How so?" He questioned, a daring look plastered onto his face.

Leaning in closer as to now we were just inches apart, I started speak "Well for starters, when I do this-" I whispered bringing both of my hands up while slowly taking his hat off. I kept my eyes on his the whole time though because in all honesty, I wanted to see what I was doing to him because I knew for a fact that it drove him crazy. His eyes were completely focused on mine as I moved in such delicate matter with every move when finally, I ran my fingers though his hair and it's then, when they went somewhere else.

His eyes were now focused on my lips as he seductively licked his. I knew we wanted to lean in and kiss me but it wasn't worth risking it considering we were still on Sarah's front steps and that basically anyone could see us. It was bad enough that my hands were tangled in his hair and that I was all over him but we couldn't go any further even though I knew just how badly he wanted it because I wanted it too. Our faces were so close that our noses were touching but still, we weren't moving in. Neither of us wanted to get caught. His breath dangled across my face as I closed my eyes trying to resist the desire of pushing my lips to his. I found myself craving the familiar feeling that I had learned to love over the past week: the feeling of his lips over mine.

This time, it was my fault though. I shouldn't have run my fingers through his hair because I knew what it was going to do to both of us but still, I did.

Suddenly, his hands left my body as they rested back onto his lap pulling away all together. It was probably too hard for him to resist and he had to stop everything all at once which I didn't blame him for doing either. Actually, I was happy he did it because if not, I could've possibly lost it and then I would've been in big trouble.

A sigh escaped my mouth as I realised that we should probably go back inside. We had been out here for quite some time now and they were probably wondering what was going on. But I didn't want to go back inside, I wanted to stay out here with Austin. In the back of my mind, I was wishing we could go back to his house but I knew we couldn't, we had already done that last time we were here.

I turned my head to face him once more, observing his beauty for the last time tonight. I wanted to take it all in, I wanted everything to be fresh in my head because he kept my mind off of stuff. There was just something about him that made me forget about everything.

Then, the door came opening itself up, letting the light from the house illuminate the entire front steps.

I was still looking at Austin though, I didn't care who was at the door I mean after all, there was nothing wrong with looking so that's exactly why I kept on doing it. But after a good five seconds, I detached my eyes and turned myself around just to see the very last person I wanted.

Austin turned around too, both of us looking at him "I want to talk." He mumbled.

I swallowed hard not wanting to do so. I had just told Austin about the whole thing, about how I felt, about how it happened and I didn't want to go back to that moment again. I didn't want to deal with him.

Silence took over as Austin leaned over to me, pushing a strand of hair behind my ear "It'll be okay," He whispered "Just tell him how you feel." And with that he got up leaving an empty space by my side. His words actually comforted me and I knew that I had to do just as he told me so, it would probably be the best way to go. Even though I didn't want to, I had to get it over with.

Barely a second after, Cameron sat right next to me, where Austin was previously seated. I took in a deep breath preparing myself for what was to come next.

"I'm so sorry," He began to say "It wasn't intended to be like that it just- happened."

"But why?"

He shook his head "I don't know."

I looked out in the distance trying to contain the anger that was slowly building up inside of me from his words. The fact that he didn't deny it either told me a lot but anyway, I knew he wouldn't have. He was too honest and always said things as they were, straight up.

"But Cameron, you didn't stop kissing me! Why would you even want to kiss me, we're practically best friends I mean, it doesn't work that way." I shouted. I was honestly so furious against him. He may have totally screwed up our relationship and as much as I didn't want it to be this way, it was. I needed to know the real reason as to why he did that.

"Trust me, I know. I shouldn't have." He said as his head hung low, probably in shame because he knew how wrong he was. He probably felt the same way as I did knowing that he may have completely messed up our relationship. I couldn't even begin to explain how awkward the situation felt, it was awful.

"But you did and you can't take it back." I said "I- I just need some time to think stuff through okay?" He nodded as I got up to go back inside. I really did need some time to think, I knew I would eventually get over it but not tonight, that was too much to ask for. I wouldn't want our friendship to end even if the world depended on it because I love him way too much for that. I simply needed some time clear my thoughts and think things through.

* * *

It was about midnight and we had just finished watching a movie.

After debating over an hour on what to do, we decided to simply watch a movie which I was very glad of. During the whole time it played though, I wasn't paying attention. My eyes wandered around the room to the beautiful boy sitting across from me then to the boy I loved but hated at the same time.

As much as I didn't want to, I thought things through. During the whole time, I thought about everything and came to the conclusion that I had to just let it go. He made a mistake and it's just human; everybody does them. I couldn't possibly stay mad at him because I knew it would eat me alive and slowly kill me on the inside. Cameron was someone I was very attached to and to let him go just like that would be the biggest mistake I could ever make. Even though we fight a lot and have arguments almost every day, it never stopped me from loving him. I adore that boy with all my heart. It was just going to take some time for me to forget about it but I knew that eventually, everything would be back to normal.

So now, everyone was just sitting on the couch doing absolutely nothing.

We decided that it would just be best to head back home considering everyone was getting tired and that we had nothing else to do anyway. So I got up and made my way to the door.

"Madie, you want a ride home?" Cameron asked as I put my shoes on.

"No it's okay." I reassured him. I was already getting a ride with Austin and anyway, Austin and I lived closer to each other so he wouldn't have to waste any gas on doing a detour to get me home even though it was only a few minutes from Sarah's house.

He let out a fainted okay and gave me a hug before walking out the door.

I had to admit though, that it was kind of weird. It didn't feel the same as before and I hated that. I wished things were different but they weren't and I had to suck it up. There was just one thing that I needed to remember and that was the simple fact that everything happens for a reason. Whichever that reason may be, there's a meaning to it.

So finally making my way out of Sarah's house myself, I sat down into Austin's car while he did the same right before starting the engine. Before I knew it, we were on the road.

The ride was short and quiet as to neither of us were talking. It wasn't an awkward silence though, it was just one that was comfortable; exactly what I needed.

The car finally came to a halt as he parked himself in front of my house. I absentmindedly stared at it not wanting to leave. I didn't want to leave because first and far most, I wasn't tired and second, I didn't feel like being alone. I wanted to be with somebody, feel somebody.

Tonight basically tore me apart emotionally and I needed someone to be there with me because I knew that if I was to be left alone, my mind would start thinking about it again along with over analyzing the situation. I had had enough and I just wanted to relax, take my mind off of everything. It was something so simple though but it worked, it's always worked.

"I don't want to go." I declared in a soft yet stern voice making him look directly at me.

"Why not?"

I shrugged my shoulders "I'm not tired." And all he did was nod as the car started rolling down the street again right before parking into his drive way. I was quite taken back by his sudden actions, I didn't think he would've let me go that easily but I guess he proved me wrong, once more.

Entering his all too familiar house, we were very quiet considering his mom was sleeping. He then took my hand and we skipped up to his room in the fastest yet quietest of motion possible. I hadn't even had time to take my shoes off so I did that once I got into his room which as usual, was messy.

So I sat down on his bed as Austin stood up, completely focused on his phone."What are you doing?" I asked truly curious as to what had him so entertained.

"Twitter" He answered taking a seat by my side.

"Can I see?"

His head shot up while he looked at me with wide eyes as he scanned my face repetitively debating on whether he should pass me his phone or not.

Finally, he passed his phone over and I went right up to the top refreshing his mentions. First off, I was surprised that he actually gave me his phone and second, he had so many people tweeting him it was ridiculous, I guess he had a lot of friends.

Once my eyes left the bright screen just to meet with the ones that were distinctively watching my every move, I brought my right hand up and cupped his left cheek with it. I started stroking it repetitively as he closed his eyes probably enjoying this. I didn't stop there though as I gently kissed his right cheek making my way closer to his mouth with every kiss I gave him and right when I reached the corner of his lips, I stopped and barely pulled back just enough as to our noses were touching. "I want to know what makes you so special." I emphasized on the last word making sure to pronounce every letter it carried. There had to be something about it though, there just had to be.

Suddenly, Austin came pressing his lips to mine in such gentle matter that it took me by surprise. I kissed back not being able to resist to the temptation but soon pulled away realizing that he was just trying to shut me up and make me forget about it but he had another thing coming because I, on the other hand, wasn't going to let it go.

I figured that maybe I just had to find out for myself what was so special about him considering he wouldn't tell me so without event thinking, I spoke the first words that came out "Sing me a song."

I watched his eyebrows meet together as one just making me wonder even more so what was making him feel this way but not long after, he relaxed while his facial expression soften. "Which one?" He asked.

I leaned over kissing him again, letting my lips linger there for a mere six seconds. I wanted to make him feel safe, to make him feel as if he had nothing to fear around me because in reality, he didn't. He could do anything he wanted and I wasn't up for judging him in any way, shape or form. I didn't want him to hold back on anything.

"You decide." I sweetly spoke giving him a genuine smile.

I watched him get up and make his way to his closet. Once he opened the door, he took out a guitar and came sitting right back to the spot he had previously left a few seconds ago.

In the whole process of this happening, not one word was spoken. He started to strum a couple cords, adjusting them I supposed, while I intently watched him doing it.

Once he was done with that, I heard him clear his throat right before his gaze met mine "Are you sure you don't have a song in particular you want me to sing?" I shook my head letting him decided on whatever he felt the most comfortable with.

He took in a deep breath before starting to play his guitar and before I knew it, that voice of his started to sing.

At first, I thought I knew the song but I came to realize that I didn't. I had no idea what he was singing but one thing for sure, I was blown away. As I listen to him more and more, the words he was singing weren't even registering in my head. All I could seem to concentrate on was him-- his voice. When I thought that his humming was soothing, I had another thing coming because never would I have thought that this would've came out of him. I didn't know how to react; it was just so peaceful, serene, relaxing, soothing but despite all the above, it seem to hold so much emotion behind it all. Something that I most definitely noticed was that he was singing from his heart. The songs he sang probably all had a meaning to him and they were most likely picked with attention and care.

Still, there was something about the way he did it all, something I couldn't quite make out but I had seen just enough to tell me all I needed.

Soon realizing that the whole room went silent, Austin's eyes were set on mine, awaiting an answer. I got so lost into my thoughts that I hadn't even realized that he had stopped playing but one thing I knew was that he looked nervous. He seemed tensed and I just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that he was so unsure about himself because he had absolutely nothing to be unsure of. But the least he knew was that he was perfect and absolutely nothing less.

I didn't know how to tell him though. How can I show him how much I loved it? I wondered. I was at a loss for words and just to try and say something wouldn't work, at least not a speech of anything like that.

Making my way closer to him, I took his guitar and gently rested it on the floor to get it out of the way. Then, I scooted closer right before bringing my lips to his ear, kissing there softly "You know how you make me feel good?" I started "And that I end up not being able to say anything afterwards because it was amazing?" I moved on top as I was now straddling him. He didn't say anything though, he just stared at me as his eyes slowly began to fill with lust and desire which made this devilish grin sneak onto my lips. "Well guess what? It happened again." And that was the only thing it took for him to understand. I knew that he knew what I meant.

"How did I not know this?" I whispered, my breath dangling across his face. Our lips were now only inches away making it extremely dangerous. "Huh? Tell me." His hands finally found their way onto my waist as he brought them all the way down, resting them on my thighs. Feeling the heats from his hands transfer onto my legs turned me on. I don't know why it had such an intense effect over me but it simply did.

Bringing my hands to his shoulders, I gently pushed him back as to now he was lying flat on his bed while I hovered over him. This sense of control and fervour took over me as I started kissing up his neck, finding his sweet spot in a matter of seconds. He let of a soft moan while I kept sucking the skin there, making sure I made him feel good.

I've been waiting since Wednesday to do this, my mind stated the facts, a whole two days.

I continued kissing all around his neck making sure I got every spot right before I moved upwards, reaching his jaw line. I stopped and descended a bit until I reached his ear again "Oh, and before I forget to tell you," I pressed my lips to his ear "You were amazing." I whispered letting the word "amazing" roll off of my tongue in such fluent motion and that's all it took to finish him.