The Past Can Hurt. {Louis Tomlinson} (Complete)

Chapter Fourteen.

I woke up to a beeping noise and my head hurting like hell. I twitched my fingers and found that someone was holding my hand.

"Hey, Kitten. Are you awake?" Louis' sweet, angelic voice questioned as he rubbed the pad of his thumb in a circular motion over the back of my hand. My eyes flutter open.

"W-where am I? What happened?" I ask with a groan.

"You're at the hospital, sweet pea." The nurse said as she walked in with a clip board.

"I'm Laura, I'll be your nurse. How're you feeling?" She asked genuinely, getting her black pen ready to write stuff on the clip board.

"I'm alright. My head hurts like hell and I feel a little woozy-like sick and dizzy, woozy." I reply, watching her jot it down.

"That's normal, considering the fact you haven't been eating right lately and you've been under a lot of stress." She states in a condescending tone, looking at me disapprovingly.

"What do you mean? I've been eating healthy." I defend.

"I don't doubt it, but,perhaps, you haven't been eating as much as you should be for a girl your age and size. You're very small for your age." She says in a light tone as she comes to my side to check the machines I'm hooked up to.

"Babe.." Louis trails off.

"I'm fine!" I snap. "I'm eating just fine."

"No, you're not. You're unstable. Therefore, we will keep you overnight and I'm gonna bring you a tray of food. You better eat it if you want to leave anytime soon." She warns before brushing my hair out of my face and leaving to, what I assume, get a tray.

"Katy, I-" Louis starts before I cut him off.

"Don't, Lou. I've been just forgetting to eat, that's all. I'm fine, promise." I reassure him, giving the best fake smile I can muster up.

I know I'm not okay, but they don't have to know that. I don't need any more people than I already have in my messed up life. You can't blame me if you don't know what has happened though, which you don't. I don't plan on letting anyone in. I already let  the boys -especially Louis- get too close. Life has caused me much pain. Depression has caused much of the pain, but how I got my depression is worse. Just like how I smoke, it's bad; but the reason I do it is worse. 

Pain, like a knife, cutting through my flesh; anger, burning through reason, turning me from a nice person to a monster; sorrow, pulling me down into the abyss known as depression.

"Here, sweetie. Pancakes, sausage, and milk. Eat it all, or you won't be leaving." She hands me the tray before walking out.

"Where is everyone?" I finally ask.

"Harry just texted me saying they're on their way up." As if on cue, four loud boys, one pregnant woman, and an oldish man burst through the door.

They all say their hello's and I mumble a hi back.

"So, what's going on?" Niall asked, biting his nails worriedly.

I opened my mouth to say something before the door opened and a very handsome man, probably around twenty-three, appears in my room.

"Hello," He smiles charmingly. "My name is Dr. Monroe. Katherine, is it?"

"Yes." I answer and sit up straighter.

"Well, have you told your.." He looks at the boys, then Lauren and Simon. "Friends..about what's going on?" I shake my head to say no.

"Well, she hasn't been eating right lately." He starts.

"What do you mean?" Lauren asks concerned, looking at me the doctor then me.

"She's been skipping a lot of meals, haven't you noticed?"

"Well, yes. But she has always eaten afterward, right?" She looks to me and I look down.

"M-my stomach does-doesn't sit well when I-I eat." I stutter and mentally face palm myself for doing so.

"What do you do after you eat?" The doctor asks.

"Does it matter!?" I snarled.

"Do you....throw up?" He asks, smirking.

"I'm gonna wipe that stupid smirk off your face here in a minute!" I bark.

"Katy!" Simon gasps.

"So you're not denying it?" He smirks more.

"Fucking hell." I mutter under my breath.

He's really pissing me off. I wanna smack him right upside his bloody head! I'm gonna if he doesn't stop.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" He smarts.

"Let. Me. Go. Home." I growl lowly.

"No, you're staying overnight. Eat that and maybe you can go home tomorrow." He counters.

"Get out and I will." I retort.

"You all make sure she eats that." He says referring to the rest of them.

"Of course, doctor." Liam reassures him, closing the door behind Dr. Monroe.

"Eat." Louis says roughly, dropping my hand and sitting back in his seat.

"No." I reply bluntly before sitting back and crossing my arms.

"Fucking eat before I feed you myself!" He yells, getting up and shoving my food to me.

"Louis, stop!" Zayn cuts in.

"Fuck you, Zayn!" He shouts before storming out.

What the hell just happened!?

"K-Katy?" Niall asks after awhile of my staring at the door in disbelief as he and Harry slowly start making their way toward me.

"Fuck!" I exclaim, shoving my tray to the ground and flailing around on my bed while screaming and crying.

"Katherine, cut it out!" Lauren demands sharply.

"No!" I scream as I stop to look at her, my cheeks hot and wet with tears. "Don't you get it!? I don't want to fucking be here!"

"Where? What're you talking about?" Simon wonders aloud.

"Here! In this hospital bed, this planet! I wanna fucking get out of here! I wanna fucking die!" I wail, ripping everything out and away from my arms and getting out of bed. "Can someone fucking kill me already!?"

"Katy.." Niall's voice breaks as tears well up in his eyes.

"Please, fix it." I sob, falling to my knees and holding my chest as if it would concave if I wasn't taking these short, ragged, sharp breathes.

"Fix what?" Liam questions.

"Me." I croak, my throat dry and burning as everyone stares at me like I'm some kind of deranged animal.

"Oh, Katy." Harry whispered as he came over to me and picked me up, taking me to the bed and laying me on his lap.

"Katy, it's okay." Niall says just above a whisper, rubbing my back as Harry shh's me quietly in my ear and strokes my hair. This only makes me cry more and I find myself making a noise between a sob and a gurgle.

And there it was. The breaking point. What happened tonight to get me here, I'll never know. I just know it's been built up. I knew it was coming, I just never knew it would be so soon and in front of these people. And the worst part is, I probably scared them to the extent of them all leaving like Louis did. I don't want to lose Louis. I need him like I need air, as cliche as that sounds. I love him! I didn't even know I was capable of love until him. But he obviously doesn't want me anymore.

"Kill me." I said, my voice hoarse and my head killing me.