Paint | PJM

18

NA EUN's POV

Before he could go on with his second news , tears welled up in my eyes and began rolling down my cheeks like rivulets. It was just a natural reaction when im in a state of shock , despair and fear .

No one could express my current emotions and it would be a lie if i said that i wasn't affected by what Dr Kim had said to me. The piece of news was so devastating that i just needed to cry it out .

It was as if icy fingers had made its way and gripped my heart , shaking me to wake up to reality once more .

No not now please .
Not when i have a boyfriend.
Not when i have Jimin .

Upon seeing my tears , Jimin immediately held me in his arms as he hugged me tightly , attempting to calm me down . My brother on the other hand just remained at his own seat , at a loss for words .

Dr Kim took his leave and closed the door for us . Once he left , my tears spilled out in a consistent stream like a regular tap that everyone has at home . I felt weak and pathetic , i knew that getting to stage four would come sooner or later but i have never expected it to come so soon .

Time flies when you are happy and having fun . My body felt numb and i laughed at myself bitterly .

"Can i have some alone time ?" My voice cracked but the message that i wanted to deliver to the two boys were crystal clear . On cue , both of them left the room as well , leaving me on my own .

Memories of Jimin asking me out and us completing the written wishes on the bucket list together rushed into my head like the waves on the beach the other day when we watched the sunset.

The memories were haunting me so much and all i could think about was what the future would be for Jimin if i wasnt around . Would he live on well ? I mean — he's handsome , successful and also a nurse who may become a doctor in the future . He has a great life ahead and i was a huge ass burden dragging him down .

Ill just be alittle selfish for now .
I'll keep you for a few more months before i let you go .

That thought crossed my mind and i couldnt imagine how i would eventually break up with him . It was just too hard to say those words out .

It was ridiculous. How can i get attached to him when i had only met him a few months back ?

——

That evening , Jimin let out a small smile as he approached me with a tray of food . I knew that he was sad too , but he wouldnt show it to me .

"Hey princess , here have some food . Theres some plain rice and steam fish for you today ." He winked but had a bitter smile left on his face .

He's affected too .

"Its okay to cry sometimes Jimin." I said softly as he took a seat and scooped the first spoonful of rice for me .

"But boys shouldnt cry . " he said and i knocked his forehead with all the strength that i have in me .

"Dont you lie to me about your feelings please ? I know you are hurting Jimin." My gaze on him softened , seeing how his face was changing drastically .

Initially he was acting all tough but now he was just like a little baby as he had placed down the bowl and utensil , instead , lying on top of me and touching my face. .

His eyes were brimmed with tears but he doesnt blink at all , trying to squeeze them back in . " im scared."

"Im scared too." I admitted .

"Im scared that when you leave me , i would be like a lost sheep without a direction and a woman in life . I cant live without you Na Eun ah . " He choked on his words .

"Shhh ... you know , even if i do leave you one day , ill still be here in your heart right ? " I muttered under my breath .

He nodded slowly .

"No matter where i go , I'll be beside my little mochi Park Jimin , you have my promise ."

"we will just have our roles swopped . I'll be your guardian angel this time and you'll be my first and last love sick patient ." I continued , shedding a tear.