or when you plummet.
i got out of bed at eleven a.m. i can't remember the last time i did that and remained groggy, as i did today.
the house was quiet all day, and my brain just hurt. i thought to go to the pool would help my state. it used to do that, right?
wrong. i was neurotic about how alone i was, how no one else was there, how neurotic i was about the smallest sounds and things in the water. i left within fifty minutes.
every time i talked to someone - mostly via snapchat - i felt the need to put up some facade, mostly because i knew that even though i was in nondescript emotional pain, they would try and try and fail to help.
allergies stuffing my nose and depression making everything heavy and blank and boring, i decided i would try eating.
(it took me an hour to even open the can of tuna, i was so indignant about eating.)
i felt sick afterward, of course. because somehow, depression made nutrients feel like poison.
YOU ARE READING
Smart Girl
Non-Fictionthoughts from the smart girl. //the journal of wren// //highest rank #2 in non fiction// //all names of real people interacted with here are altered from their original versions for privacy's sake//
