Backstreet Boys Imagines

Don't Wanna Cry

This is a song that I enjoy listening to and although its in Korean, i think the English interpretation of it is beautiful.

Also, its a Howie imagine because my boy deserves the love. Here it goes.

++

Because I love you, because the words I love you
Isn't enough, no matter what I say
I loved you so much, where'd you go?
Did you leave because you don't like me anymore?

It was the seventh time Howie was calling you, and finally you picked up his call. He wasn't expecting it, what with the way you left.

'What do you want Howie?' You asked, a tone of resignation very clear in your voice.

Howie could hear it. You're tired, exhausted and drained from all the fighting. He knows, and he feels the same way. But he also knows he loves you, and that was all he could say.

'I love you,' he blurts out.

You sighed, 'Howie come on, I'm really exhausted.'

'But i love you. Is that not a good enough reason for you to stay? Is that why you left? Because I love you and you don't love me anymore?'

You couldn't answer him and for the first time, you hung up on him.

Don't play around, I know you're right there
Feels like you'll appear, so I'm just waiting
I need to find you, need to find you
Because if I cry right now, I might not see you

'Who you waiting for, man?' Brian asks, passing Howie a cup of coffee.

Howie smiles as he sips the coffee, 'I think she's coming today. I'm just gonna wait here for a bit.'

Brian sighs, 'You mean Y/N?'

Howie smiles bitterly as he nods.

'Well, I'll leave you to it then. Just dont be out for too long yeah?' Brian advices as he pats Howie on the shoulder.

Howie could feel the tears coming, but he's not going to let them pour. He needs to be strong.

The path that used to be familiar, it's now unfamiliar
Is this the path I know? I ask myself
What if she's looking for me?
I'm looking for you right now

Howie walked down the all too familiar streets. Its been months since you and him broke up, but this is the first time that he's going to your house after the breakup. It feels different now, although it used to be so familiar.

'Is this the right thing to do?' Howie mutters to himself as he stops walking. He bit down on his lip as he pictured you in his head.

'This has to be the right thing. She's got to be waiting for me.' Howie convinces himself, as he continues walking.

Don't play around, I know you're right there
Feels like you'll appear, so I'm just waiting
I need to find you, I need to go
But tears well up and it's getting blurrier
But I don't wanna cry

Howie takes a deep breath as he knocked on the wooden door three times. Every second that passed as the door was unanswered, the faster his heart thumped.

He sighed as he checked his phone. You had no latest postings on your social media so he wasn't really sure what he should do. As he was busy scrolling through his contacts, the door opened up.

'Uh, you knocked?' A guy who looked to be in his early 20s asked.

'Oh yeah, so sorry to be disturbing you. Is a Y/N Y/L/N around?'

The guy scratched his head, 'My family and I literally just moved in about three days ago. I think she's not here anymore,'

'Are you sure? I mean, I know she's here,' Howie spoke up, clearly in denial.

The guy only shook his head before he closed the door.

Howie's hands trembled as he dialled your number. Unsurprisingly, the call went straight to your voicemail.

'I'm outside your house. And uh,' he paused as he let out a shaky breath, 'I need to see you. Please. Please tell me where to find you and where I should go. Please...'

He slumped down on the pavement, he didn't want to cry but somehow, the tears was just too much for him to hold back.

I'm alright (I'm not alright)
I don't miss you (I miss you so much)
With words I don't even mean
Even if they're lies, I need to say it

'We are here live with the Backstreet Boys!' The interviewer introduces the group.

The boys all gave a wave as they settled down in the chairs. Minutes passed by and soon it was time for questions about their personal lives.

'So, Howie, I heard that you and long time girlfriend Y/N, have called it quits. How are you holding up after the whole heartbreak?'

Howie took a deep breath as he smiled, 'I'm alright. I'm doing better and I'm very happy to be where I am now.'

'Do you miss her sometimes? I mean, 5 years with the same person and suddenly she's not around anymore.'

'No. I don't miss her. The memories, yeah of course. But her? No, not at all,' Howie states.

Somewhere miles away you were tuning in to that very interview and your heart was aching.

'You're alright but I'm not... I miss you so much,' you whisper, letting the wind carry your thoughts.

Little did you know, Howie didn't even mean the words he had said. At the end of the day, there was always a part of him that will always love you.

++

This was long. I'm sorry. Thank you for reading, and all the little things you do with this book. I appreciate it so much.

Love, Ned.