anonymity was never an option

87: castiel

"So what are we here for again?" Gabriel questioned as he and Castiel stepped onto the porch of Lily's house.

"A car." Castiel mumbled reaching behind the mat to grab ahold of the shiny silver key underneath it.

"A car?"

"Michael's car... well I guess now... my car."

Castiel turned the key around in his hand and shoved it into the handle, turning it until he heard the click. He pushed open the dark green door and walked into an unfamiliar room.

Castiel had never actually been to Lily's.

He had met her a few times at dinners and coffee with Michael, but he never actually ventured out to this side of town.

When he entered the room, he smelt what seemed to be the remnants of a cinnamon candle. He looked around in the small dark living room. There were pictures hung on the wall of her and her sister, and her family's dogs. And then on the table there was a frame of her and Michael smiling and looking into each other's eyes. Castiel picked it up and smiled... they looked really happy. He would've bet money on them getting married at some point.

"Where's the garage?" Castiel asked his brother behind him as he set the frame back down on the table.

"Through the kitchen, first door on the right." Gabe pointed into the empty doorway in front of him.

When they walked into the kitchen, it was remotely clean. In Gabriel's kitchen there was old bread and weeks worth of mail scattered everywhere, but in this kitchen the counters were organized and the only clutter was the pictures and papers on the fridge. Castiel read one of the notes that stuck out from it as he walked by.

Have a good day love. I'll see you when I get home. I was thinking maybe we could go see a movie tonight? Call me if you get a chance at work.
-Michael

He lifted the green post it note from the fridge and held it between his fingers.

"They were coming home from a movie." Castiel said quietly.

"Yeah." Gabriel whispered.

Cas took a deep breath and stuck it back on the fridge where he found it. He turned around and spotted the white door he assumed was either the pantry or the garage. As he walked over there he spotted a small table with a woven bowl in the middle. Castiel looked inside of it and saw two things. One was Lily's name tag from work and the other was a little black car shaped keychain. He picked it up and looked at it closely.

"Is this a..."

Castiel opened the door to the garage quickly and the lights automatically came on.

"Holy shit."

On the left side of the garage there a was a sparkling blue Tesla Model 3. It took every nerve in Castiel's body to not grin like a child given a king sized candy bar.

He had wanted a Tesla since the moment the car came out. His brother always use to take him to car shows and every single time he looked for the Tesla's, which although they were rare to find were Castiel's favorite car to see.

"Not gonna lie. I'm so fucking jealous right now." Gabriel stated with a mad tone in his voice.

"Oh my god." Cas walked down the steps into the concrete room. "This is mine now."

He walked over to the car and unlocked it, the headlights beaming against the metal garage door. He opened the driver side door and leaned inside, looking at the almost completely brand new looking car.

"This is sick." He gaped as he sat down in the driver seat. "How the hell did he afford this?"

"Probably that promotion he got a few months ago."

He started up the car with the press of a button and watched as the dashboard screen illuminated.

"I can't believe he had one." Castiel whispered as he slid his hands over the steering wheel. "Why wouldn't he tell me?"

"Uh, it was probably gonna be a surprise, I mean he had to know how excited you would get." Gabriel stated blatantly from the middle of the garage. "So uh... are you good if I go now fanboy?"

Cas looked over to his brother and nodded.

"Yeah I'm gonna grab my bag out of your trunk and head home. I wanted to be back to class tomorrow."

"Ew. Okay suit yourself. I'm staying another night. Call me if you need anything."

Castiel looked to the visor above him and pressed the large button on the garage door opener. The metal door in front of him slowly started to rise so he took the opener off the visor and tossed it to Gabriel.

"Can you set that inside when you lock up?" He called.

"Yeah." Gabe mumbled back.

Cas looked back down to the silver T on the steering wheel, and smiled widely as he closed the door.

The state of utter-pissed-at-the-world that he was earlier seemed to lift off of him like a blanket.

He felt morbid being so giddy when the only reason he was sitting in this car was because his brother never would again. It was bittersweet. He wanted to be through the roof excited, but something still lingered in knowing this was a result of the death of the only member of his family he actually cared about.

Cas let the smile fade off of his face as he looked through the previously played music on the dashboard.

All of Michael's playlists were automatically synced and even his calming taste of music left Castiel missing his brother more than ever. He didn't dare to connect his own music to the car yet; perhaps listening to some of Michael's favorites would make him feel a little more at ease.

Or maybe it would just make him feel worse about the situation at hand.

He didn't really deserve this car.

His brother did.

And now he's gone.