The Fight I kept within Me

chapter 13

Everything he has gone through, we have gone through. My mother had a total of five kids every one of us can write our own book indicating our life and how every one of us viewed it. Of course, it will be different something  similar but not quite the same, THIS is MY point of view on how I see things and how I feel about them in my life.

People have to put forth the effort on trying to do better for them to feel free or be at peace with life itself, as well as receiving unconditional blessings. People only have faith for a season or when they want something out of life but when that season is over or they have gotten what they wanted they stop believing or keeping that same faith that they had once before. You see you have to be consistent with god and show him that you are worthy of him. That is something I  have to work on myself because I know what he is capable of and I know and my heart that he is real so I owe him that.

Finding yourself is not easy especially when your fighting your own demons and confused about what is right or not. Have you ever sat down with god and had a Deep conversation with him and you suddenly out of the blue got chills that is an AMAZING FEELING. He show's you how great he is while letting you know that he's listening. Your life is already mapped out for you those of you who are still here have a purpose, we are put on this earth to give back and help someone else, changing their lives and yours in some type of way. Rather it's something that was said or done small or big doing so with a genuine heart can lead you to so many blessings.

Trying to reach your full potential and all areas of life can be hard, intimidating, and very time-consuming. Knowing that your family means everything to you but also realizing and hurting at the same time knowing that they don't act as one, as a unit genuinely. You can feel when there is love in the home, you can feel when things are genuine at heart, living a lie of our own misery can defeat us mindedly and physically.

I just feel like a lot of things are being forced right now for example being around each other knowing that we all need our own space and to be apart for a while. Were just not in the right predicament financially to do so, so that's taking a toll on each of us also causing us to stress even more in our own way. I have many more challenges to face and I just hope and pray that my family gets it together so that we can all move forward.  I don't want to hate anyone I want everything to be genuine the love, the trust amongst one another. I know that we will never be complete again due to my brother being gone but I want us to get at least close to where we were.