Pure Torture: a Hunger Games Fanfiction

Chapter 50

Katniss

"There are some wounds I just can't mend. I just pretend." -Marcus Foster

Sweaty and pale and shaky, I wake from my nightmare silently. No screaming. Trying to calm myself down, I take a deep breath. I roll over and shut my eyes, trying to sleep again.

In a half hour, I realize that my attempts at sleeping are utterly futile. I rise from bed carefully, so as to not wake Peeta, who still sleeps soundly next to me. I walk slowly and silently out of the room, careful to avoid any creaky boards of the floor. I go down the stairs and sit in the dark in front of the dying fire.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes. Thinking of what happened two days ago, Peeta's proposal, the duck, I feel tears in my eyes. I rub my eyes with the back of my hand, and although it's only 4 am, I pick up the phone and call my mother.

"Hello?" She says quietly on the other end.
"Mom?" I ask, my voice hoarse.
"Oh my God, sweetie. How are you? Are you okay? It's so early..." She asks.
"Oh," I say, "Oh... Yeah I'm okay. It's just hard, you know? First losing dad... Then Prim... I hardly see you anymore."
"I know. I'm so sorry. I'm in 4 right now, and I don't know when or if I'm coming back. I wouldn't be able to bear it..." My Mother says.
We cry together for some time. I talk about Prim and Finnick, I ask her about District 4. I try to keep my sobs quiet so Peeta doesn't hear and wake up. I know if he wakes and hears me downstairs sobbing, he'll panic.

My Mother and I are somewhat regaining our composure when I remember what I really called to tell her. She's sniffling on the other end when I tell her.
"Mom..." I say.
"Yeah?"
"I forgot to tell you something. It's really... It's really, um, important." I say, wiping a tear from my cheek.
"What is it?" She asks.
"Well, two days ago, Peeta and I. We were out in the woods all day. He had set up with beautiful spot that was all cleared and grassy and surrounded by trees. We ate and then we went to the lake... We had just come back..." I explain.
"What? What?" She asks, getting concerned.
"I was just sitting there, I had seen a Duck, and then Peeta had me stand up. He was telling me how he loved me and how he had always loved me and that he would always be in love with me." I say.
"And?" She asks.

"And... And then he was down on one knee, asking me to marry him." I say, crying at the memory.
"Oh my God, Katniss! What did you say?" She asks. I can hear the tears returning.
"I said..." I say, taking a deep breath, "I said yes."
I hear her break into sobs on the other end.
"I know, Mom. I know I'm so young and that I'm only 18 but I just felt that it was right. Please don't be upset Mom. I know Peeta loves me. It just felt so right, being with him..." I explain.

"Katniss, I'm not upset! I'm so happy for you, Sweetie. I'm so, so happy that you found someone who would always be there for you. I know you did what felt right." She says, crying.
"So you're okay with it?" I ask.
"Of course I'm okay with it. If Peeta's stuck by you all this time, through all this trouble, I know he's going to continue. And any guy... Any guy who would stay with you through all of this, is a good one. I'm so happy for you." She says.

"Thank you, Mom." I say. We say that we love each other and I tell my Mom we haven't started even thinking about the wedding, and then we hang up.

I sit on the couch in the cold of the early spring morning. The sun is just starting to rise. I know Peeta will wake up soon, just to check if I'm still sleeping. I get a glass of water and sit shivering on the couch again. It's silent and eerie and cold and lonely. I don't want to go back upstairs, though. I feel so terrible already, I know it's going to be one of the bad days. Nothing can comfort me, not even Peeta.

When Peeta finally wakes up, he comes rushing down the stairs. He breathes a sigh of relief when he sees me sitting on the couch. I clutch my cup of water so hard that my knuckles turn white and I give him a weak smile. He knows it's going to be one of those days. He quickly comes and sits next to me. He pries the cup from my hand and sets it on the coffee table.
"Hey. You okay?" He asks.
I stare straight ahead and nod, as if in a trance.
"No you're not. I know you're hurting." He says gently.
"I always am. But I'm living with it. I'll be okay." I say. I stand up, fighting it.