Pure Torture: a Hunger Games Fanfiction

Chapter 57

Katniss

"And it's a damn cold night trying to figure out this life." -Avril Lavigne

I lay in bed, locked in Peeta's embrace. Sleep doesn't come. It never comes.
I feel his warmth all around me, but is it enough to melt the ice I feel in my veins? Maybe not.

Silent tears slip from my eyes as I think of the children I will never be able to give to Peeta, who wants them so badly. I think of the happy marriage that I will never get to live in because of what's wrong with me. I feel as if some dark creature is on top of me, stealing my breath and stealing all happiness from my mind.

Suddenly, I feel myself out of Peeta's arms, standing up in the darkness of the bedroom. I begin to walk quietly to the bathroom. I don't know what's drawing me there. I hear the bed creaking behind me, and I turn slowly to see Peeta sitting up.
"Katniss? Are you alright?" He asks.
I just stand there, unmoving. I feel as if I'm frozen, time is frozen.
My hands feel like ice.
What's happening to me?

The next thing I know, I'm walking again, towards the bathroom. Peeta's there in an instant, holding my hand. He walks with me, though the darkness, acting as a guide.
"What do you need to do?" He asks.
I still don't answer. I just keep walking slowly. When we finally reach it, I reach my shaking hand to the medicine cabinet. I finally realize what I'm going for.

Sleep syrup.

But Peeta doesn't know that. His hand flies up to where mine is reaching and covers the handle to the cabinet.
"Katniss, what are you doing?" He asks.
Dazedly, I speak.
"I just need to get something." I say.
Reluctantly, he moves his hand, but only a bit. I open the cabinet.

My hand finds the bottle of sleep syrup. My shaking hands fumble with the lid, struggling to get it open.
Peeta takes it from me, examining the bottle to see what it is.
I must mumble something like "sleep syrup."
"Sleep syrup." He says, realizing, "I get it now. Here, hold on."
He takes the bottle and goes downstairs.

I sit on the edge of the bathtub, and let out a breath. I put my face in my hands and will myself not to cry, not to fall apart. I hear footsteps coming up the stairs. Peeta comes back with a cup of tea and places the bottle of syrup back into the medicine cabinet.

He holds the tea in one hand and clutches my hand in the other.
He leads me back to bed and I glance at the clock. It's only 12:30 am.
He sits on the edge of the bed after he gets me situated in it. He hands me the cup of tea.
"It's in there." He says, gesturing to the tea.
I nod a little.
"Thank you." I say.

I drink half of the tea before placing the cup on the table next to the bed. I lay down and close my eyes. I feel sleep dragging me out.
The last thing I feel before I'm taken completely by sleep is Peeta's warm, gentle hand on my cheek.

--

I'm surrounded by wildflowers. The sun warms my face. I sit in a seemingly endless Meadow, watching a butterfly flit around the colorful flowers. I stand up and begin to walk through the meadow.

"Oh my God." I hear a voice say from behind me. I turn toward the voice. Standing in front of me is my little sister. Prim stands, unscathed, in a white dress with her blonde hair flowing down her shoulders and onto her back.
I raise a hand to my mouth.
"Prim..." I say, my voice breaking.
"Katniss?" She asks. I see tears forming in her eyes.
She hurries toward me, throwing herself into my embrace. I wrap her in my arms, she wraps me in hers.

Finally, I can feel what I've longed to feel. Her arms around me. I can feel her embrace, smell her presence, see her face. My little sister.
One of us loses our footing, and we topple to the ground, laughing and crying all at once.