Off Ice.

Chapter Six.

Finn

A tattoo artist.

A fucking tattoo artist.

My Aves is dating a fucking tattoo artist.

I know I'm a fuck up, that much I've learned in the past three years, but holy shit. I really don't know how I let this happen.

I genuinely felt my whole body shut down when it hit me. I was so confused when he was walking up to us, I thought he was just a fan. But then it registered that he said pretty eyes and I realized that a fan really wouldn't come up to me with that kind of greeting.

I mean I wouldn't put it past some people, but in this case it was pretty obvious that wasn't it.

I wonder if he's given her any of the tattoos she's had.

I noticed the ones going up her arm and the skull on the back of her bicep. They're really fucking hot and I just hope that he didn't give her any of them.

He slid his hand to her ass and I swear I almost sprung on the dude. Obviously it's not my place anymore, but fuck. Seeing someone else touch her fueled a raging fire in me that made it feel like I was just going to combust on the spot.

I'm not the only one who calls her baby anymore. I haven't called anyone that since her and she's used to it from another guy now. I haven't even thought about getting into another relationship and she's been in one for a year.

I'm a piece of shit.

Cam was right, but I already knew that. I knew that leaving her was the absolute dumbest fucking thing I could of ever done. I thought it was for the best, I felt like I was holding her back. I know that she's hated me saying that because she swears I wasn't, but I could tell. She wasn't going out because she didn't want to miss the few times I was actually able to FaceTime her, she wasn't making many friends. She was missing out on college and doing things that normal people our age do and I felt like it was my fault.

And I was scared. I was scared she would end up resenting me. But that sure fucking backfired, didn't it?

I love Avery. I'll always love her and I'll always be in love with her. I wasn't lying when I told her that the day we broke up. I've been absolutely miserable without her.

The hookups I've had since then have only made me feel worse because none of them compare to her. Not by a long shot. There is not a single person on this planet that could make me feel the way she does.

I even called someone her name once. I would of been mortified if I wasn't so fucking heartbroken. That's the day I realized that she's probably with another guy, but she's not saying my name. I'll never hear or see her like that again and that kills me.

I hope she didn't notice that I literally couldn't keep my eyes off her both times I've seen her. At the game she was wearing black ripped skinny jeans and a Kings shirt tucked in that I noticed has Casey's name and number on the back. She seemed thinner though, which isn't a good or bad thing, I don't really care about that at all. Her black hair is a lot longer now though and she just looked run down. She didn't have that usual light behind those big brown doe eyes I love. She just didn't seem right and it was more than just being tired.

We were 19 when we broke up, so she obviously looks older now. She's still the prettiest girl I've ever seen, though. I'll never be attracted to someone the way I'm attracted to her.

But she's attracted to him. I mean, how couldn't she be, the guy could be a fucking model. I felt a piece of my soul die when he kissed her. It was my worst fucking nightmare. The image has kept me up the last couple nights.