Tried With Fire - (Ruth Harris Series)

Chapter 18

'That was a lovely speech.' I said, squeezing Hunter's arm on the way out of the funeral home. He was holding Olivia with his left arm while I clung weakly onto his right.
'Thanks.' Hunter said blankly. He shrugged me off. I paused, but he kept walking down the road to the car park without me, so I waited for Susie and Andy to catch up and walked the rest of the way with them.
               'Hey.' they said to me. I forced a sort of smile. 'How are you holding up?'
'I don't know.' I sighed. 'Grandma's really gone. She'll never get to watch Liv grow up, or be the mentor to her that she was to me and Hunter. I'm just, sad.'
               My eyes welled up with water, so Susie wrapped her black cardigan around my shoulders and squeezed them. My shawl was around Olivia.
               'How's Hunter doing?' Andy asked me, watching his best friend stop by his car a few metres ahead.
'He's miserable.' I said. 'Absolutely miserable.'
'Let me go and talk to him.' and off Andy strutted. I watched him approach Hunter, shake his hand and then put the other hand on his shoulder as they spoke candidly to each other. I felt Susie stroke my back.
               'Oh, chicken.' she said. 'Those are two very sad men.'
'Look at that.' I said, not listening to her. 'Hunter's talking to him. Look! He's opening up to him.'
'Isn't that a good thing?'
'...I guess.' I grumbled. 'But, Susie, it, it's not fair. Hunter's barely spoken to me since Grandma died. That was four days ago!' (Hunter's parents wanted to bury her as soon as they could so they could start to make the arrangements for her will. I presume they were expecting to return to Dubai soon after. Needless to say, after all the drama and haste they made over the funeral, and the money Phil spent on it, they didn't show up.) 'All I get from him now is the odd 'thanks', 'excuse me' and 'I'm going to bed'.'
'He's in mourning, Ruth.' Susie replied. 'Don't overthink the things he's doing right now. He doesn't mean any harm. He just, needs time.'
'Yeah, well, he used to need me.'
               'Ruth!' I heard Hunter call. I quickly looked over at him, hopeful, but he only gestured for me to get in the car. Olivia was already strapped in and Andy was on his way back to me and Susie.
               'Alright, well, I'd better go.' I sighed to the other couple. 'I'm sure Hunter's itching to get back to the loft: he's barely left it in days.'
'Don't pander to him, Ruth.' Andy said, to my surprise.
'What?'
'Give him some leeway,' Andy explained, 'but don't let him take advantage of you. You're not his dog, or chef or maid. You're his wife. You loved Grandma too - make sure he remembers that.'
               Those words meant more to me than anything anyone had said all day. I gulped and forced a smile.
'Thank you, Andy. For being nice to me.'
'Yeah, well, desperate times call for desperate measures.' He shrugged flippantly and knocked my arm.
'You'd better get going before Hunter burns out his engine.' Susie interrupted the smirk Andy and I were sharing, gave me a hug and sent me on my way.

'Is Grandma in heaven?' Olivia asked during the drive home. Hunter hardly registered that she'd spoken, so I replied,
'Yes, bambina. She's in a better place now.'
'Is she with God?'
'What? Er, oh.' Hunter offered me no help, not even a look, so I stopped watching his thunderous face and concentrated on the cogitative, cute, freckled one in the backseat. 'Er, yes, bambina. I suppose Grandma is with God.'
'Is she with Fluffy too, Mummy? Because Daddy said Fluffy is in hamster heaven. Is there more than one heavens? A dog heaven, a bunny heaven, a cow heaven...' and with that, Olivia let out a little giggle. I winced, unsure of how Hunter would react to her amusement, but he still seemed unaware that a conversation was even taking place.
               'Er, Olivia, I'm sure they're all together in one, perfect place.' I said. In truth, I wasn't sure about anything anymore.
'Do bad people go to heaven? Because Liam in my class always snaps my pencils and sticks his tongue out at me. I don't think he should go to heaven.'
'Olivia.' I said firmly. 'It is not up to us to judge other people like that. Everyone makes mistakes, and we have to try our best to forgive them. And ourselves.'
               'Do you have any mistakes, Mummy?'
'Olivia...'
'Do you have any mistakes, Daddy?' she asked.
'Olivia.' I repeated. 'That's enough questions for now. Me and Daddy want some peace and quiet, please.'
'Oh. Okay.' Olivia sighed. 'I miss Grandma.'
'So do I.'