Their Hidden Treasure

Chapter 24

Trigger warning: Mentions of suicide

Sophia’s POV

I woke up when Elijah closed my bedroom door. Well, technically, I wasn’t even sleeping. I was enjoying Elijah’s soothing words and the sound of his voice. I was enjoying the feeling of his fingers running through my hair. I was half-asleep but still aware enough to know that he left the room.

But I wish I didn’t. I wish I couldn’t hear what they were saying. I wish I hadn’t heard the words that broke me.

I should have known it was all a lie.

They were going to give me away.

They were going to give me to a new family.

I should have known. I should have known it was all a lie. I should have known they were pretending to like me. I should have known it was all too good to be true.

They didn’t want me. They couldn't wait to get rid of me. I was a disturbance. They didn’t want me. Alexander didn’t want me.

Why did he play the piano for me then? Why did he comfort me? Why did he help me? Was it all just some game? Were they going to wait for me to start trusting them and then laugh and tell me that they hated me all along? Why did they hate me so much? I didn’t do anything. I was just born.

I should have never been born.

I closed my eyes and let the tears fall down my cheeks. My ears were buzzing and all I could hear was my blood rushing through my veins. I couldn’t hear anything else since that doctor said they were going to give me away. My heart started racing immediately and all I could hear were the sounds of my body rushing toward a panic attack.

They were going to give me away.

Did they already have someone in mind? What kind of people were they? Would they hurt me? Would they hurt me more than James did?

My stomach turned and I felt a need to throw up.

What if they were worse?

A part of me wanted to tell them to just give me back to James and Elizabeth. At least I knew what kind of pain they were going to inflict. I knew them and I knew the pain they caused. Going back to them would be less terrifying than going to some people I never met.

But why did they want to give me away? Did I do something? Did I break a rule? I probably did. I looked up without being told to. I talked. I did everything I wasn’t supposed to do.

I broke all the rules.

Another wave of nausea washed over me and I couldn't keep it in this time.

I jumped out of bed and ran toward the bathroom. I barely managed to throw myself in front of the toilet before everything I ate started coming out.

Images of everything James did to me came back. I remembered every touch, every word, and every injury he caused. I remembered how I begged and pleaded with him at the beginning. I remembered how he laughed at me. I remembered how he made it hurt even more when I cried.

Would my new family be the same? Would they be worse?

My stomach kept spasming violently, but I had nothing to throw up anymore. I was just sobbing quietly, trying to find just one reason for all this pain I had to go through.

What did I do? What did I do to deserve it?

I’d been trying to find the answer to that question for a long time, but I never got it. I would never know why.

But I really didn’t need a reason. Maybe there wasn’t even a reason. Maybe I was just born to be tortured. Maybe it was without a reason and maybe it was always meant to be.

I didn’t need to know why, but I needed a way out.

And the only way out was death.

James didn’t kill me. My brothers didn’t kill me. Everyone wanted me alive so they could torture me. I needed to take that from them. I needed to find my peace. I would never be at peace while I was being thrown around between them like their own torture doll. I would never find my peace while I was breathing.

I looked up at the mirror and thought about breaking it. I thought about grabbing a piece of broken glass and slicing my wrists with it.

But they could hear the noise. They could try to save me. They could try to keep me alive so they could give me away to someone who was going to torture me. They could try to keep me alive so they could torture me themselves.

No. I couldn't let them find me. I couldn't give them a chance to save me. I didn’t want to be saved. There was nothing left to save anyway.

I was nothing but a broken girl. My heart wasn’t working anymore. My lungs refused to let the air in. My stomach refused to keep the food inside my body. Nothing was working inside me and nothing was worth fighting for.

A tiny spark of hope created by Alexander, Elijah, and Lucas was gone. It was dead and nothing could light it back up.

I forced myself to stand up. My entire body was shaking and I couldn't feel my legs.

I was trying to think of a way to end everything without them being able to find me in time to stop me or save me. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted them to find my body. I didn’t want them to touch me again. I didn’t want anyone to touch me ever again.

And then a thought came to me.

It was snowing outside. It was cold outside. I could just leave and walk into the forest behind the house. No one would be able to find me if the snow covered my body.

I tried to take a deep breath, but my lungs refused to cooperate. I forced my legs to move and I left the bathroom.

I was barefoot and in my pajamas. I was cold even standing in the middle of the room. It wouldn't be long until I froze to death.

I felt a warm tear fall on my cheek as I opened the bedroom door and stepped out into a dark hallway.

I looked toward the library and my chest tightened. I remembered how safe I felt in Alexander’s arms. I remembered thinking that I finally found my peace.

Knowing it was all a lie hurt more than anything James ever did to me.

I started to trust them. I started to open up to them. I started to need them.

And it was all a lie. They were always going to give me to someone else.

I forced myself to turn around and walk away. I couldn’t look at the library anymore. It hurt too much. Everything hurt too much.

Everything was too much.

I didn’t even realize that I walked to the front door. One moment I was staring at the library and the other I was unlocking the front door and stepping out into the cold.

My entire body started shivering even before I closed the door behind me.

Another tear fell on my cheek.

I wasn’t scared, though. I was walking toward my peace. I would finally be at peace.