Healed By Love

CHAPTER 49

AUDELIA'S POV

"It was my first and, well, only relationship before you." He says as I lean my head on his shoulder, gazing up at the dark sky ahead of us like the previous days, except this time I am not alone, nor is he.

"What was her name?" I ask, looping my hand with his and entangling our fingers together, keeping it over my lap as I sit cross-legged on the balcony floor.

"Alessia." The name rolls off his tongue in a bittersweet tone, mirroring his facial expression. While his eyes seem to be in a faraway place filled with memories, the scowl on his face shows his feelings about said memories.

"What happened to her?" I ask; different scenarios are playing in my head, all having a common ending: death. "Did she.....die?" My tone is awkward as I struggle to find a better way to put it out.

"Yes." I don't know what to say or how to react. So, I remain silent, letting him speak..

I stay quiet, letting him take his time to open up about this part of his past. "I first met her in school. I was quiet most of the time, and she was not. I wanted to be alone, but she never let me. And that is how our friendship started."

"We spent a lot of time together and got really close. Even after our studies were completed, we were still by each other's sides." He lets out a deep sigh. "After some time, I finally asked her out, and to my surprise, she said yes." Despite his words, his tone is flat.

"She knew everything about me, including the mafia. At first, I was scared that that would drive her away from me, given that I had kept such a big thing hidden from her all that time. However, it did not."

"Honestly, it was kind of the stuff people dream about and read about in romance books—long walks under the moonlight, shared secrets, promises of forever, and all the other stuff." He scoffs, but by the look in his eyes, I am certain that, deep down, he is not so nonchalant about this topic.

"After years of being together as friends and then as a couple, one day, she vanished."

"Huh?" I asked, slightly taken aback by his words and how his tone changed from nonchalant to simply bitter and cold. The look in his whiskey pools also shifted into spite as his jaw tickled once. Twice.

"I woke up to a letter she left." I squeeze his hand, trying to offer him any type of comfort I can. "'I can't do this anymore. I need to end our relationship.' Were her exact words on that fucking piece of paper."

"I did not know that someone leaving my life could have affected me so much until she walked out without giving an explanation. If she had told me her reasons or told me that I was hurting her in any way, I would have let her go myself. But she just left, leaving me with nothing but questions and a fucking heartbreak like a teenager."

"How did you know she died then?" I ask.

"Sometime after leaving, she was murdered in her house. After investigating, the case was not solved. Even I tried to look into the matter but all I found was dead ends. Eventually, I let it go." I can see the little guilt in his eyes.

"You did everything you could." I reassure him. "You thought that if I went on this mission, you could lose me too." I say this as I finally understand his point of view. Now, looking back at our arguments, the dots seem to connect perfectly and i remember his words from seconds ago. "You were scared to lose me."

"Scared?" His gaze locks with mine. "I was fucking terrified, Smeraldo. I don't know if I would have made it if I lost you."

"Xaen, you have to trust me. Nothing will happen to me." I reassure him, hoping that this time he understands my reasoning too.