21 - moth tattoo

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TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of Self harm. Self harm.

Belles POV :

He pulls away from the hug, his hands dropping to rest on my thighs as he rubs them gently. My heart just started beating regularly, calm down.

His thumb tracing the moth tattoo on my thigh. My entire body goes into shock just by his touch.

I clear my throat to speak but I'm cut off.
My head flicks over to the door— Leo
"What's happening? What happened— Mirabelle what's wrong?!" He said in a state of panic walking towards me.

I smile weakly at him, His eyes flick toward Matteo's hands on my thighs. He squints his eyes. "Hey- Hands off my sister!" He hissed walking towards me and pulling me off the bed toward him.

Matteo simply smiles covering his face. Christina snorts.

I wrap my arms around my brother hugging him tightly. "Hey.. Are you Okay? What's wrong?" He said in a soft tone, as he hugged me close to him.

I swallow the lump in my throat. "I'm good, I just—" I look to Christina who's speaking to me through her eyes.

"You should tell him."

I can't, I can't even imagine how hurt he would be, how hurt he'd be to find out I never told him, how hurt he'd be to find out papa didn't care, and let it happen.

"The dude was just rude, and I couldn't say anything back—" I blurt pulling away from his warm embrace.
"Do you want me to send a bullet through his brain?!" He cuts me off.

My eyes widen in shock. "Hey I'm all for it!" Matteo shouts. "I second that!" Christina adds. "I'll pull the trigger!" Jada shouts, excitement in her tone.

My eyes widen as I glare at all of them, before I look back to Leo. "No, Don't, that's papas friend, do you know how pissed off he'd be?" I say shaking my head.

He scoffs. "I don't care, If he makes my sister cry, I'll make him cry and beg for his life, and then end it in the most torturous way—" I sigh and shake my head repeatedly. "Don't." I say quietly almost in a whisper.

He sighs in disappointment. "Fine.." he says softly. "You ok?" He asks for one final time. I nod. "I'm gonna go shower, before the chlorine ruins my hair." I say walking away into the bathroom.

I shut and lock the door, standing against it staring at myself in the mirror. I take a deep breath as I start the shower, I open the cabinet where I keep my knives.

Don't do it
Do it
Don't do it
Do it
Don't do it
Do it.
Don't. Do. It.

I've been clean for years, I have no scars because I never cut deep enough, Except once, On my thigh, I covered it with a moth tattoo.

I stare at the knife intensely.

It's not worth it.
Oh but it is, it'll remind me how it feels to be human, it shows me that I can feel something. That I'm not numb to everything around me.

Imagine how disappointed Christina would be. How disappointed Leo would be if he knew.

I sigh taking the knife and barely scratching my arm and then throwing the knife back into the cabinet.

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