STEEL (The Aurum Trilogy Book 1)

Chapter 8

EIGHT

Lauren

“DOES THE TRUTH HURT, LAUREN?”

YES. FRANKLY, IT DOES.

I was done with this. I was done with killing in order to live. I was done with risking my life for a bunch of Judas Iscariots. I was done with paying the price of lives for other unworthy beings.

“YOU’RE A MONSTER. YOU’RE JUST LIKE THEM.”

“A monster…”

“A monster…”

“Just like The Control…”

“Just like The Alliance…”

“You’re a monster, Steel.”

“YOU’RE JUST LIKE THEM.”

I stumbled down on the ground, face flat. I felt a small searing pain on my right cheek. I felt a tiny gash ooze out a little blood on my fingers. I cupped my face and rocked myself back and forth, knees pressed onto my chest. I felt tears run down my eyes, making its way to my tiny gash and sending diminutive surfs of pain. And that’s when I lost it. I screamed at the top of my lungs. The birds who were settled upon the barren branches quickly flew away as they heard my cry. Dozens of them spread their wings gloriously over the clear blue sky. I knew that if I made noise, they’d see me. They might even arrest me or take me back to the agency, thinking that my loyalty would still be pledged to them.

BUT I WAS DONE. I WAS DONE WITH ALL THE DECEPTION, I WAS THROUGH WITH ALL THE LIES. I WAS DONE WITH LIVING WITH ALL THIS BULLSHIT.

I HAVE TO STOP THE HAWK. I HAVE TO STOP THE ALLIANCE. I HAVE TO STOP ANOTHER WAR. I HAVE TO DO IT EVEN IF I STAND ALONE AGAINST THOUSANDS OF ARMIES. I HAVE TO DO IT EVEN IF I KNOW I’M POWERLESS TO DO SO. I HAVE TO DO IT EVEN IF IT MEANT DYING, EVEN IF IT WILL KILL ME.

This isn’t about revenge this time. This isn’t about me or Jonathan. This time, it’s about my DIVISION. This time, it’s about JUSTICE.

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I stood up and pain shot through all over my body, causing me to plummet back down. No, not now. I told myself. I was having another attack and I could tell that this was worse than ever. I balled myself on the ground and my nails dug into the soil. The pain was unbearable. I shut my eyes and I could see thousands of colors shattering: red, blue, violet, orange, neon yellow, green, gold. I could see the image of my mother, wearing her apron and baking cinnamon rolls for me. I could see Zac once more, the two of us finishing off Mr. Sanders. I could see The General, announcing to The Hawk that I was its top agent, making my heart swell with so much fire and pride. I could see Jonathan, the two of us, our hands linked as we escaped Bunker 53’s explosion.

My vision was a blur. The dark and dead barks of trees turned into grimacing and menacing shadows with their branches ready to grasp me and claw at me, their roots ready to envelop themselves around me and obliterate me until I turn to dust and ashes. The bright blue sky which hung above me spun endlessly, causing me to lose my balance as I tried to stand up and make my way. The cracked and sterile ground beneath me spun as well and on the last moment, it dissolved into pieces making me think I was going to fall into an interminable abyss. I tried to stand up again, but I could no longer move my legs. It was as if they were glued to the splintered ground. I tried moving my arms to get the antidote which was inside my backpack but they wouldn’t budge. All I could do was lay down on the ground and stare on the open sky. I couldn’t give up. With all my strength, I tried to move my whole body but I was rewarded with a heavy feeling inside my chest. It was as if heavy bricks were being thrown on it and piled as it got heavier and heavier. I had a sudden flashback of Zachary and I laughing our heads off as we celebrated on our success for the mission the previous night. I remembered Zac and I sitting there every time we would be back in the headquarters in one piece. I remember Zac and I hanging out in his chaotic room, listening to blasting music causing the neighbors to knock on our doors or report us to the nearest police. I remember Zac, teaching me the basics of fighting on my first weeks at the agency. I remember him taking the blow for me when The General caught me outside after our curfew. I remember the kiss that he gave me before I went on my last mission, MY FINAL MISSION FOR THE HAWK. But all those also seemed like a blur, it seemed like a big fat LIE. Zachary was part of The Hawk and that was why he was acting all strange and weird the last time we saw each other, the moment that he bid me goodbye and made me promise to get back to him safely. HE WAS PART OF THIS LIE AND HE PLAYED HIS ROLE PRETTY WELL.