Love Complicates Things

Pilot: The Obliteration

"I love you."

Usually those three words are the beginning of a beautiful relationship. Or the end of a mementos life. They bring happiness and excitement into ones heart. A sort of...joyous ringing in your ears as the blood pumps through your veins and your heart pounds.

As the words spill out of my very best friend in the world, Will's, lips I feel a tragic poisonous feeling sink into my very being.

An obliteration of a lifelong friendship.

"You what?" I breathe, staring into his big beautiful hazel eyes. The eyes that have held so much comfort and respect all of these years, getting me through the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Eyebrows furrowing, his hopeful expression falters. "I-I love you, MayBell."

Again, I'm hit with the weight of a freight train.

Many many times have we said "I love you" and many times we have meant it in a completely different way. I can tell by the look in Will's eyes and the fidgeting of his hands that he's speaking from a new part of his heart.

An uncharted part.

I breathe in deep, looking him straight in the face as he awaits my reply.

I have a choice at this very moment. I hold his very heart in my hands and I have no idea what to do with it.

I can tell him the truth, the truth that I do love him. I love him like my very closest brother and friend. I love him more than almost anyone in my life.

Or I can lie.

I can tell him I feel the same and spare him the shattering heartbreak of unrequited love.

But I could never do that to him. Will is far too sweet and pure hearted to ever deserve something that isn't real.

A memory runs across my mind. The memory of Will confiding in me about his first love, Jules. She had lead him on profusely and used him to the fullest extent for popularity and money. He gave everything to her.

Yet in the end, all she gave him back was the shattered remains of his heart.

He cried for hours that night in my lap. No amount of talking or gentle reminders that she was never any good for him could ever help him.

It took him six months to get back to his old self.

That was a year ago and it still feels like just yesterday.

I will never ever allow him to go through anything like that again. Ever.

Blinking away my thoughts, I put on my best smile, grabbing his slender hands and weaving my fingers through his. I squeeze them tenderly.

"I love you too, Will."

The sinking feeling furthers when his face lights up, tears welling up in those hazel eyes.

"Really? Honestly?" He asks genuinely.

I hesitate. This is my last chance to take it back.

"Yes. With all my heart." Well that part is the truth. I do love him.

Just not in the way he wants.

I'm suddenly being picked up and spun around. My hands grab onto his shoulders, his arms tightly wound around my waist.

I laugh despite myself, "Put me down you weirdo." I demand, patting his shirt twice.

He chuckles, setting me back down on the floor of my bedroom. "Sorry I just got excited." I watch his cheeks turn slightly pink as his hand comes up to grasp the back of his neck awkwardly.

My heart saddens. I can't remember the last time he was embarrassed or awkward around me.

"No it's okay I understand." I press my lips together in an attempt to make a reassuring smile.

He nods, looking around my room as if searching for words.

"So what now?" I help him out.

He looks surprised at this question, his eyebrows furrowing. "Oh. Uh...I don't know. This is all kind of weird to be honest." Yeah tell me about it.

"But um..." he begins, "I think the next step is to...tell everyone?"

"What?" I inquire, confused.

"I mean, don't you think our friends and family should know that we're dating?"

"Dating?" I squeak, eyes widening.

A panicked lump forms in my throat.

Abort abort.

"Yeah..." his grin falters, "Unless that's not what you want. I suppose I should ask you first huh?" He laughs lightly.

I nod along with a half smile, half cringe on my face. "Ha-ha yeah." I try.

Before I know what's happening, my hands are in his again and he's looking into my eyes.

"May, we've been best friends for as long as I can remember and...I don't know what I would do without you. I know that this is all going really fast but...will you consider being my girlfriend?" His awe spired look as he scans my face squeezes at my heart.

I lick my lips, staring at my best friends' love struck expression. And I want to cry for the fact that it's directed at me. The tears form in my eyes but place a smile on my face to sell it.

I can't hurt him.

"Yes. I will."

Well I guess there's no going back now.