15: He's Dead.

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Never have I ever felt such pain

My little brother is dead, this isn't fair.

I never head is voice again, the last word i heard come out of his mouth was "Bye."

What did I ever do to deserve pain like this?

What did he do that was so bad he had to be punished with death.

Alfie still had no clue, so when I walked through the apartment door he was of no knowledge to the passed hour.

Alfie was bubbly, he had obviously recieved no text or anything.

"Zoe! Guess what?" he asked me.

I wasn't in the mood for guessing games.

"What?" I replied.

"I found us a massive house just outside Brighton, where we can raise the baby and possibly other kids, we also have so much land to let Elsie run around and play. It's perfect."

"Thats amazing!" I said before throwing my arms around him. "Urm listen Alfie..."

He now looked concerned.

"Joe he's umm... He's dead."

Alfie's eyes starting filling up, then did mine and we stood there in eachothers arms crying. Elsie came into Alfie's arms and started whimpering, as if she knew what was happening.

______________________________

Joe's Pov:

I died painlessly and peacefully.

I was ready to go, just didn't want to leave.

I never got to see Zoe again, or Caspar. 

Not even one last conversation.

I'm not going to live to be an uncle, husband or father.

But I died a friend, brother, son, nethew and aquaintance. 

It was a privilidge to have been internet famous, well known to the world and have girls fangirling over me.

But that's not going to be what I miss the most, it was never going to be.

I'll miss my hug's from Zoe, making Darcy giggle, hitting on girls I never had a chance with, eating MacDonalds three times a week, drinking melted chocolate ice cream, using my spare time to edit, vlogging my days, riding rollercoasters, climbing to my favourite place and looking over the beach, watching the sun set, meeting veiwers at Vidcon, singing to myself, italian food, hot cups of tea, chip shop chips, lazy days in joggers and on my laptop, long showers, staying up late at night to watch youtube videos and swimming in the oceon.

That would be what I would miss most. 

I still loved my veiwers even though I wasn't living, I still loved making youtube videos, I still loved that feeling of relief I got after I had uploaded a video.

It meant so much to know I had thousands of people on earth mourning my loss, but it was heartbreaking to know that Caspar's prayers were't answered.

He begged god to let me live but I didn't, but I am so proud of him for staying strong.

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