COMING HOME

Chapter 10

~~So what then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?
                           Romans 8:31(NKJV)~~

Tobi laid on the bed facing the wall. Sleep had become something impossible for her to do these days.
Her social media buzzed notifications announcing Caleb's engagement ceremony to one of his children's mother's. She suspected the woman was running his account because he wasn't active but either ways, she lost and they won. She'd given him too much credit and placed him above where he should have been. She gave him the power to hurt her. How could she blame herself for this? Wasn't your partner supposed to be your everything?

Her head ached, she'd been wrong to put absolute faith in him and where she should have been observant, she chose not to see and acted like a dog that handed him a leash to use on her.
She admitted that his charming charisma had the power to drive any lady that was a sucker for light-skinned men crazy. To top up his game, he had long curly hair and blue eyes you could stare into all day. His accent was an added benefit when he wanted to seduce you.

Her father's voice came to her again. "Accept what has happened because you can't change it. Cry and lament as much as you want, I understand. Take your time to heal but don't forget you must rise again. You have only a few months to be a university student then you'd be in total control of your life. You will want to curse, fight, break things but remember it was better you discovered it now than later. You're strong willed, determined and above all, my queen. I love you very much honeybee, get some rest, tomorrow brings healing you have to tap from. Goodnight my love."

The next day hadn't brought healing or even a little comfort. She'd in fact felt worse than before reliving hearing Caleb admit he was cheating till her mother broke the news to her. At school, she was still the centre of discussion and that was likely to continue for several weeks.

Could she really fix her life? Would a brighter day come? She understood the common phrase that said "Love is a scam." She turned to face the door, anytime soon her mother would come knocking asking her to get ready for their morning exercise at the stadium. She frowned and placed the pillow over her eyes. She'd pretend she still knew how to sleep.

Tobi was finally coming back to school though she'd extended her stay home by two weeks. Caleb gazed at the flowers he'd purchased since last week expecting her return. He was grateful they weren't real flowers or they wouldn't have been as fresh but it had also cost much to get the florist to arrange them because they looked real.

His morning alarm rang and he stretched to put it off. It was time to say his prayers.

God is here. He thought excitedly realizing that his room was becoming windy. Since he made a vow from his days in JSS3 to take God seriously, every morning he woke up to pray, he'd feel like he was in the sky. The room would become as airy as morning breeze filling his nose and lungs with fresh air. He'd thought it was from the window so he closed all the windows one day expecting it to stop but the wind became intense like a heavy storm was coming waking up his roommates. He remembered two of them accepted Jesus after he preached to them.

'Good morning God.' He greeted and sat up on his bed. 'I think I'm getting cold, kindly reduce our ac.' He joked feeling tingles on his skin as heavy breeze blew passed him. 'Tobi is coming back tomorrow, I can't explain how excited I feel right now, I feel like you made a way for me to finally tell her how I feel about her.' The windy movement stopped. He didn't mind and continued. 'Right now my heart is beating too loudly I can almost see it popping out of my chest.' He laughed. 'I bought her flowers, I think I'd bring them with me when we go to the airport to wait for her. Yeah, she'd like them.'

Son, how was your night?

Realizing his mistake, he quickly prayed. After praying he opened his Bible to read but his mind reverted to her. For the next one hour he struggled between reading his Bible and thoughts of Tobi. When his alarm rang at five, he gave up trying to read his Bible and closed it.

The day her mother brought her into this world I was there, I watched her grow and have stood patiently by her. Do you think you can love her more than I do?

Chris was ready to take his bath and was pulling off his shirt when the voice came with another heavy breeze. His heart sank as he sat back on the bed.

'Lord, I thought you planned for the both of us to get married, I thought that was why you always told me to pray for her?' No reply came. Chris sat frustrated for the next twenty minutes waiting for an answer. He got angry and stood up facing the ceiling. 'If you didn't want us to marry, why did you tell me to love her, why did you tell me to pray daily for her? And you know I have done that everyday since I met her. I thought you wanted us to marry.' He sat back on the bed and pulled his shorts. When he got up to go to the bathroom, a heavy breeze pushed him back to the bed.

Love? You have known me long enough My son, you have known My ways, read My words and have spoken to me daily and still you don't understand love. I gave you My child to love and nurture as you would love and nurture a brother. I didn't send her to you to marry, I sent her to you to groom until she realized how meaningless her life was without Me.'

Chris bowed his head in pain. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Everytime he heard God talk concerning Tobi it had been to love and take care of her but now he was getting a better picture of what God really wanted him to do. Was God then playing a prank on him, why did He let him be in love for five years without warning him? Why did He wait so long?

Love and nurture My child, take care of her and make her into someone I can be proud of.

Chris frowned. Those were the exact words he'd been hearing for years. He put his hands over his eyes to prevent himself from crying. This meant that everytime his heart beat a little faster he saw Tobi wasn't an indication to fall deeply in love. God didn't let her value their friendship so that when she broke up with Caleb she would realize his love for her and marry him. God hadn't done any of those things, he had fallen foolishly in love with someone he should have preached to. Unable to hold back, he lifted up his head in agony and cried.

Like I loved you and gave My life for you, do you possibly think you can ever love more than I do?

Chris fell back on the bed and refused to answer.

Like I formed the world and gave you a love that can never be quantified, do you think you can love more than Me?

He cried harder.

I was bruised, beaten, cursed, mocked and killed for her sake. Do you think your love will ever be enough to save her?

'No.' Christopher whispered silently.

Why do you hold on to something you cannot control? She is mine, moulded in My image and likeness. I love her as much as I love you.

'Okay!' Christopher shouted. 'But please, let me tell her how I feel, just once, let me tell her how long I've loved her.'

No!

'Please, please...' He let the catarrh flow from his nostrils to the bed. 'Please God, I know you own me, I accept you love her more but I want her to know I love her.' No reply came again. The room suddenly felt calm. A huge part of him left his body.

He laid facing up and cried for a long time. When he turned his head and saw the flowers, they looked withered. He found it strange but he was too tired to stand up and check it. Facing the other side he hugged himself.

'Let your will be done.' He knew what he had to do.