Night Sky (Harry Styles)

27. hints

CHAPTER 27: HINTS

                             Monday, June, 5th 2017 - Los Angeles, California

          As soon as Harry pulls into the parking lot of the hotel, I open the car door and step out. The air outside the car isn't any fresher since the window of the backseat door is still missing. Without missing a beat, I walk away from Harry who is just getting out of his car. I hear him locking it and then following at a rapid pace.

  "Estelle, come on, wait." He begs and soon catches up with me but he doesn't try to hold me back from walking away, instead he just walks beside me. "Stella."

 In my head I think about what he did wrong and why the words he has spoken in the car caused a stinging pain in my chest. Harry doesn't love Jess but is too much of a coward to break up with her because he is interested in another girl that doesn't even want her. Maybe it's the fact that he is interested in another girl and I'm afraid he might drop me for her, too. If he is ever going to drop anyone for her, even though it doesn't seem like it at the moment.

 When we enter the small but colourful lobby, Harry stops dead in his tracks and the temptation to know why he stopped following me and begging for my attention is too difficult to resist. So instead of walking as fast as I can in my drunken state, I stop as well and spin around as I lean against the wall to gain my balance back. Our argument in the car seems to have sobered up my mind but it looks like my body hasn't caught up yet, as feelings of nausea and dizziness are taking over every now and then.

  "What's wrong? You were so quiet in the car." Harry asks and carefully takes a step closer to me.

  "Nothing's wrong. I'm just—I'm starting to get a headache."

  "Stella..."

 I sigh, "Harry, there's nothing wrong. Even if there were something wrong, I wouldn't know what it is."

 Tight-lipped, he stands in front of me and observes my every move and countenance. He has his strong arms folded in front of his muscular chest and one leg is lazily crossed over the other as he leans, just like me, against the wall.

  "You would tell me if you knew there was something wrong, right?" Harry sheepishly asks and I crack a brief smile. "You didn't seem very pleased when I picked you up and then we just had that argument in the car...that's why I'm asking."

  "I wanted to stay at the party and, I guess, drink into oblivion but our conversation in the car kind of sobered me up." I chuckle. 

The corners of Harry's mouth twitch upwards for a second.

  "I'm just surprised that you'd rather keep lying to Jessica, in many respects, than giving her the chance to get over you and fall for someone else. That is very selfish of you and I didn't know you'd be like that." I tell him honestly and just when my words leave my mouth and he hears them, I know I addressed something I shouldn't have. Pain flinches in his eyes, at least from what I can see, and his eyes become cold and more distant.

  "And you aren't selfish? Why are you still in a relationship when Sam when you hate him, huh? You're doing it for yourself. To prove yourself that you can be like everyone else, that you are up for dating. You agreed to being his girlfriend because you wanted to prove to yourself that committing yourself to someone isn't that difficult. Where did you think of Sam? That all seems very selfish to me." Harry bursts out and now he addressed something that he shouldn't have.

  "Firstly, I do not hate Sam. I don't love him but that doesn't mean I hate him. Secondly, you might be right. I am selfish. I know I am. I might not have been in love with Sam when I started dating him, but I wanted to fall in love with Sam. I don't know why I never did." I say and my voice is shaking, "And thirdly, fuck off, Harry."