Sunflower Love

❁~

24 years. Ups and downs were experienced. I've graduated. Got a job in a field that I've always dreamed about. Happy. At least I think I am.

There's nothing that makes me feel otherwise.

That was until the envelope came in. The crisp white envelope with the words that broke my heart more than I had wanted.

"Save The Date! Here's to our future, Mr. and Mrs. Denver~"

Liam was getting married and he had decided to invite me to his wedding. Why would he do this to me? He must know about my feelings and now he's tormenting me by showcasing his stupid wedding in my face. 

Right?

Upon opening the invitation, inside gave me instructions on how to RSVP, the location and date, and some small rules for the guests. In my frustration, I tossed the invitation to the side only to find that it had flipped when I had tossed it. On the back was a handwritten note and I found myself snatching it back up with a sense of urgency.

Hey, Winnie. I've seen a lot of the stuff you've been working on and I was hoping I could hire you for my wedding coming up. I also miss you. If you'd like, meet me at Mel's for Sunday brunch this weekend and we can catch up. Yours Truly, Liam.

Yours Truly? You were never mine, Liam.

The bitter thought pierced my heart and I could feel the sting behind my eyes just as a single tear slipped down my cheek. I flipped the invitation back over and ran my thumb across the names.

Julianna Montgomery. Soon to be Julianna Denver. She was a pretty woman, smiled way too much, and frequently stopped by my art shop because she was also an artist. I had a conversation or two with her every so often, but nothing past the usual discussion on paints or brushes. She was sweet. Lovely even.

Pathetically, I would compare our works when she'd bring hers by during gallery weekend every month. Picking her work to pieces, trying desperately to find something about them that I hated. Truth is...she's an amazing artist. She is naturally talented. Never took a single art class and made breathtaking pieces.

While I have taken countless classes and I can barely manage to get by with the stupid degree that I aimlessly settled on. Some nights I find myself hating everything I make and crying while sipping wine as I watch another rom-com to get me through the loneliness. Other nights, I find I lose sleep because once I've grasped even the slightest bit of motivation, I work and work until I no longer have the motivation.

My sister says if I continue to work like this, then I will come to hate art. She doesn't realize that I've hated art since I started college and that I've only kept with it because I have nothing else going on for me. I'm just Winifred Lynn Benjamin. Youngest daughter who is, unfortunately, the odd one out as she decided to get a degree that will never amount to anything, at least according to my grandmother.

Disappointment. Embarrassment. Pathetic.

So I guess that is how I found myself at Mel's on Sunday. Sitting in a booth across from Liam who is talking about how great life has been. He's great. Julianna is great. His mom is great. Every single thing in his life is just absolutely fricken peachy.

And I'm happy for him. I am. I'm not allowed to be upset. He deserves this and so much more because he's a great person.

I cursed at my thoughts as I tried to stay focused on his story about how Julianna has been a nervous wreck over dresses and cakes. She apparently had to get rid of two of her bridesmaids due to some issues that ended up happening. Something about one of them talking badly about the color theme and the dresses behind Julianna's back and the other apparently made a checklist of sleeping with all the groomsmen before the wedding while simultaneously secretly hoping she'd also be able to sleep with Liam. Wild.