More, Most, Forever, & Always (COMPLETE)

33. The "Talk"

Travis Swanson-

I smiled, watching her eat her burger as she did a little dance.

"Good?" I asked, eating a bite of mine.

She nodded, sauce falling on her lip.

I pointed and she hummed, getting it.

"I'm so hungry." She laughed, taking another mouthful.

"Same." We both ate in silence, the sounds of people around us making it nice as we both scarfed our food down.

"I have a question." She sat back when we were done.

"What?" I raised my eyebrows.

"Are you or were you ever scared of losing your V card?" She frowned, genuinely curious.

"Absolutely." I hummed, eating a fry.

"Are or were?" She asked.

"Both." I nodded.

"May I ask why?" She tilted her head.

"I used to be, because I'm inexperienced and I never wanted to hurt a girl because I know it hurts for some, and I'm scared now because all I want to do is please you and I'm scared I won't do it right." I spun the straw while it was in the empty cup.

She nodded.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I don't want you to be scared, and I don't want to push anything but I keep thinking about it. So I figured talking about it would be best obviously." She looked a bit nervous.

"Keep thinking about us having sex?" I smiled.

"Mmhm." She stuck her tongue in her cheek and I nodded. She was clearly very glad everyone in this sports bar was loud.

"And do you want it to happen?" I put my chin on my palm, as my elbow sat on the table.

"Well- well yeah but I can wait. I'm not just wanting sex-"

"Hailey." I stopped her.

She frowned, the dimple in her cheek visible.

"I'm not feeling rushed and I know that's not the only way I'm beneficial to you. I understand. You wanna go talk in the car?" I asked, flagging the waitress down.

"Yeah, can I pay for this one?" She asked.

I handed my card to the waitress and she took it, giving Hailey an 'I'm sorry' smile as she left.

She was clearly thinking about something, something was bothering her.

When I got my card back, I took her hand and we walked to my car.

I opened her side for her, letting her get in before I got in the car.

"What's wrong my love?" I put my hand behind her head, scratching her scalp.

"I feel awkward talking about it, I've never really talked about it and I don't want to make you feel some kind of way." She looked at me and I turned on the car slightly to put the heater on.

"Why do you feel awkward with me?" I watched her, the side of my head resting on the head rest.

"Because I don't know. I feel like a partial virgin and you are one and I just- I hear about people having conversations about contraceptives and having a time they'll think about it and how they are scared to fuck of something. It's all in my head." She shook her head.

"No it isn't. That's how you feel and that's okay. I'm here for you sweetheart, I'm fine talking about this with you. I'm very okay with it because it's gonna happen." I nodded.

"I know I just don't want to tell you I'm thinking about it and think I'm like desperate for it right now. You're hard to read." Her voice was so soft.

"I know what you mean, but it'll happen. And it'll happen at a good time, and it will be good and never tell me that we're 'fucking' for our first time because we can fuck after but not the first time." I squinted and she smiled.

"I don't know if it would be awkward if I just said this but I take birth control. Everyday. For the past 5 years." She told me.

"Okay, but in case of anything, would you like me to have condoms on me?" I asked and she was almost gobsmacked I asked her that.

"What?" I frowned.

"I somehow forgot how incredible you were for 0.05 seconds before you asked that. I don't know why I'm shocked. Probably because I got raw dogged in highschool." She blinked, laughing.

"I don't like that." I shook my head, never wanting the mental image of another man being inside her.

That made my jaw tick.

That actually, genuinely pissed me off.

And I never payed attention.

It was one thing she got fucked but imagining her, naked, with another man who was inside of her bare.

That made my teeth hurt.

"Sorry." She whispered.

"I-did he pull out?" I asked.

"Mmhm." She nodded.

"How premature?" I wanted nothing of another man in her. I wouldn't be upset if it happened, I can't control her or her past, but I wanted something to ease my mind.

"Really early. I made sure. I was taking birth control but I didn't trust him." She told me.

I hummed.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." She apologized.

"Don't be sorry. But back to my question, what would you feel comfortable with?" I gritted my teeth together, refraining from being upset. Especially when it was not at all her fault.

It was me.

"I trust you." She whispered.

"To pull out? Babygirl your trust in me is good and all but not with that. You're gonna have me pussy-whipped." I shook my head and she laughed.

"No, I trust you." She nodded.

"But- wait hold on." I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"You don't have to Travis. I'm not pushing you because this is both of our choice. It's not just mine." She grabbed my hand.

"No-you, Hailey Aspen, are telling me that I get to lose my virginity to you like that? Like I get to have you?" I squinted.

She smiled, laughing, clearly confused by my reaction.

"Uhm yeah?" She shrugged.

"Damn." I kissed my teeth.

My heart was pounding, my dick throbbing.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

She put her hands up as if surrendering.

I hummed, nodding.

Imagining myself fixing the way she viewed sex entirely.

I wasn't a toxic man, but I wanted to ruin her for anything after me. And so far I have, but I have one more area to be superior in.

And I would be damn good at it too.