☔︎ 18 ☔︎

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☔︎ sam ☔︎

"d-dad?" i mumbled, almost a whisper as i walked through the hallway to the stairs.
"what?" he snapped, and i was so glad i couldn't see him.
"m-my friend robert is coming over, i'm just getting some food and we'll be out of your way," i explained, walking down the stairs shakily, colby's large grey hoodie hanging over my small frame, along with a pair of shorts. it was losing his smell, but it still gave me a sense of security, because it was his.
i quickly grabbed myself some snacks for both of us, not wanting to have to go downstairs again.
"well, hurry up. i don't want to see you," he snarled, and i nodded, although he couldn't see it. there was a knock on the door and i ran to it - colby.
"h-hey," i smiled, butterflies coming alive as he grinned at me, a soft chuckle emitting his lips.
"hey," he responded, me letting him in.
"c'mon, before he yells at me," i mumbled, closing the door behind him. he nodded and followed as i went upstairs, into my room. he'd gotten me a few bits of furniture, like a bedside table and a desk. not much, but at least i had something.
"can i hug you?" he asked, looking down at me with caring, soft eyes. i nodded and his arms wrapped around me, and his scent took over my senses again. i felt tears well in my eyes, from both being happy colby was here, and comforting me, and being upset about my dad. i hugged him back, my sleeve covered hands holding onto the back of his shirt. i sniffled softly, moving my head away slightly.
"i'm sorry," i shook my head, moving my arms away and wiping my teary eyes.
"it's ok, sam. if you need to cry, or rant, or just want a hug, i'm here. and i'll always be here," he said quietly, moving my hands away from my eyes and wiping my tears himself with the pads of his thumbs.
"always?" i asked doubtfully. anyone i'd ever trusted always left. always.
"always. i promise," he smiled, and i threw my arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. his hands were around my waist, holding me close to him. i loved this.
"thank you," i whispered, standing on my tiptoes to hold the position.
"it's what i'm here for. where did he hit you?" he asked, his tone soft as i looked up at him.
"my cheek," i mumbled, brushing my fingers over the sensitive skin softly.
"i'm sorry. he shouldn't have done it to you, if i didn't give you the hoodie it wouldn't have happened," he sighed, his hands still placed on my waist and mine still on his shoulders.
"it's not your f-fault," i said softly, shaking my head and hugging his chest, leaning my head against him, along with the rest of my body. one of his hands made its way to my hair, playing with the ends of it.
"c-could you lay with me?" i asked, my voice quiet and frail, looking up at him with a sniffle, a couple of tears rolling down my cheeks.
"of course. it's gonna be a bit of a squeeze," he chuckled, looking at the single bed i had.
"i'm fine with it, as long as it's with you," i mumbled, rubbing the side of my face against his chest slightly before climbing into bed, exhausted from crying, and cutting, and from being scared. but it all felt ok now colby was here. all of the bad things were drowned out when he was here.
"budge over a sec," he said softly, and i moved over, him laying down and putting his arm out. i rested my head on him, closing my eyes and taking in his scent, his presence, his warmth.
"don't leave me," i breathed, keeping my eyes closed and putting a hand over his chest, the other one near my own.
"i won't, dont worry, darling. get some rest, you need it. you're safe with me," he soothed, and the nickname sent butterflies through my stomach again. i nodded and we laid in a comfortable silence, my head laid against his chest and his arms around me.
i never wanted him to leave.


both sam and colby's recent videos are so fucked. before you cancel me, i'm talking about the fact that they had to address the amount of negativity in our fandom. it shouldn't have been a problem in the first place, but it seriously got to the point where both of them had to address it?? c'mon. where is the love in this fandom? this probably isn't worded great bc it's 4am and i haven't slept, but i hope you get my point lmao

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