IMPUMELELO

Chapter 7

Fisokuhle and I went back home we just couldn't stay because of such a revelation, the ride home was quiet no one was talking in the car. Things were awkward the first week after we got back and we were questioning what's the point of our relationship if we know that our parents wont approve of us being together but we talked about it yesterday and he promised me that he will stand by my side regardless of what our families say this thing is between us and we don't have anything to do with their past, that's what we concluded. I haven't informed my family of this and I don't plan to anytime soon.

I am not feeling well I have had a cold ever since I came back from Fisokuhles' home I have been sick and I missed work 3 days in a row. I am feeling weaker these days I should visit the clinic soon. "Nele are you sure you are not pregnant?" Ntokozo asks. Pregnant? No way, I mean I know I am not on the pill but Fisokuhle and I always used protection. There is no way. Oh my God there was this one time the time we were back in Joburg we didn't use them because we didn't have them. That's when it hit me I slept with Tumelo the day before. Oh there is no way. Absolutely no way. Would God punish me like that? Nah I am not pregnant I am just sick. "No I am not pregnant, if I was I would know. I am a nurse I know these things and I am not pregnant." I say. I am trying to convince myself more than I am convincing her. She just looks at me and smiles mischievously.

"I will bring you a pregnancy test, to be sure cuz, just to be sure." She smiles. She comes back a few minutes later with 2 pregnancy tests. I am shaking right now. I am hoping they are both negative. I do want kids but I don't want Tumelos' kids. I hope it is Sangwenis' child. I pee in the disposable plastic cup and I take the test.

My cousin is nervous like she is the one waiting for the results. I am supposed to wait five more minutes. I am pacing back and forth and I am sweating, my hands are shaking. Father God I know I have wronged you too many times, but please give me this one chance. I am praying internally. "They are ready." Ntokozo says and she is reading both of them. She is shocked, and I already know what that means I am pregnant. I take the tests from her and I am indeed pregnant.

My world stopped for a moment, I am hoping its Sangweni's child. Do I call him and inform him? Do I wait till it starts showing and pretend I didn't notice.? Pregnancy is something I cant hide. Okay Sanele breathe. I am going to pretend I am not pregnant for as long as I can, I can do it right? "Sanele what are you going to do?" Ntokozo asks she is concerned. "Ntokozo I don't know the father of my child." I say. She is surprised "How?" She asks concerned. "If I am 3 months pregnant there is a 50/50 chance Fisokuhle is the father. I slept with my ex when I went to Joburg, I slept with Fisokuhle the next day both without a protection." I inform her. She is shocked to hear all this. "You know what this is Fisokuhles' child, just pray it comes out looking like you or him and nothing like your ex, if its your ex's child it better look like you." She says. "You will not say a thing to anyone, until the child is born alright?" She says. She is right this is Fisokuhles' child.

A week later

I went to the gynae yesterday and he confirmed my pregnancy and I am 14 weeks pregnant. I don't know how to tell Fisokuhle about my pregnancy what if he puts two and two together. My tummy is already showing a bit weird I never noticed it was growing till I found out about the pregnancy. I am in Fisokuhles' house and I am thinking of ways to tell him. "Dali my grandmother dreamt of you and she says you are pregnant." He says.

Wow WTF what game is the universe playing with my life right now. I am quiet. He looks at me like he is examining me. He seems to come some realization. "She is never wrong you know? Not to offend you but you have put on some extra weight." He says. I should be offended he just called me fat, but my heart is not there I have bigger problems. "She is right I am pregnant three months going on four." I say and he is shocked. He then smiles and picks me up and kisses me. I always wonder where does he get the strength to pick me up.

"Oh my God these are wonderful news." He says with a huge smile on his face. How do I tell him the child might not even be his? How do I tell him? On top of that I still have to inform my family that my child might be Bhekizwe Sangwenis' grandchild? These problems are multiplying instead of getting better. Mhhh my life is a movie or a series right now and I am leaving it all to the hands of fate, and playing chance with my life. What happens to my relationship with Fisokuhle if the child is not his? If the child is his what happens to my relationship with my dad? I don't know how to feel about all this.