snap - thor

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prompt: weeks after thanos' snap, thor was still feeling tremendous guilt for not being able to save half the universe. he had lost everything, including you.

thor sat at the dining table, alone, thinking about anything and everything his mind could handle

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thor sat at the dining table, alone, thinking about anything and everything his mind could handle. it was fifteen days after the snap and thor felt horrible.

he had one shot.

he thought he had won.

he thought he could handle it.

he thought everyone would be safe.

he thought they had won because of him.

but they didn't.

they lost.

he thought it was because of him.

he thought it was his fault people died.

he thought it was his fault you were gone.

you were gone.

thor leans forward in his seat, putting his head in his hands and rubbing his temple softly attempting to ease the headache. you always rubbed or kissed his head when he had a headache. he felt his tears forming in the back of his eyes and he tried to ignoring it; his tears, his thoughts, his girlfriend. he tried so hard, but it was to no avail. tears slipped though his closed eyes and his breath hitched in his throat, suppressing a sob from escaping.

"i'm sorry," his whispers to everyone who died. "i tried."  he says honestly.

once he managed to temporarily stop his tears, he stood up and walked to his bedroom. your clothes spread on the floor as he smelled them until there was no scent left. your scent helped calm him down and put him to sleep, but he knew when your clothes ran out, he wouldn't have anything left to help him. you'd spray your usual perfume on your pillows before leaving for a mission so your shared room still felt like home to him.

thor had quickly realized he had lost everything. his mother, his father, his brother, his friends, his planet, and you. he doesn't cry often, but these past couple weeks had been a perfect excuse for the tears to fall down his cheeks.

he grabs one of your t-shirts and gets into your shared bed. he holds it close as his eyes slowly fall closed.

thor hadn't had an actual confirmation that you were gone, but he knew you were. you didn't contact him and you were anywhere to be found.

"thor," someone says, waking him up immediately.

he looks over his shoulder to see steve standing above him with a small, but noticeable grin.

"what?" he drops your shirt as he sits up in the bed, slinging his legs over the edge.

"come here." thor follows steve to the common area to reveal a treasure he thought he wouldn't see again.

he doesn't say anything as his hurries to throw his arms around you. you immediately react, circling your arms around his neck. he walks away with you in his arms, heading to your shared bedroom.

"y/n," he whispers as you wrap your legs around him.

you pull away and stroke his cheek. you could tell he had been crying by his puffy and red eyes.

"thor," you could see him physically relax and smile.

"i thought i had lost you, i really did." his whispers, examining your features like he used to.

thor closes the door and sets you down, still holding your waist. he moves his hand to your cheek and lets out a sigh, happy to be touching you again. you run your hands up and down his body to relax him; he had told you before how good it felt to have your hands on him. he loved physical touch and you knew that from the beginning.

"i'm here now." you whisper, slowly leaning in and meeting him halfway.

thor immediately smiles, moving his lips against yours. he pulls you closer by the small of your back and moves his hand up to the back of your head, deepening the kiss. he lets out a satisfied moan and slowly pulls away so you could catch your breath.

"i'm so tired, thor." you whispers, your lips grazing his with each word.

he steals a quick kiss before grabbing you and turning around. he fell back into the bed with you in his arms and a silly smile plastered on both of your faces.

thor had forgotten about all of his problems the moment he laid eyes on you. he made you feel so happy, so himself just by a single glance. he knew he was desperately in love with you and he made sure you knew that every moment he could.

"i love you, darling." his says as you climb off of him. 
before saying it back, you find your shirt in your spot on the bed. you pick it up, tilting your head to the side at him.

"why is my shirt in the bed?" you asks as he grabs it and throws it.

thor had already gotten comfortable, so he pulls you into his chest and steals yet another kiss.

"you know what you do to me." he whispers, putting his head into the crook of your neck and smelling your delicious scent. "you smell so good." he praises, looking up at you to see your reaction.

"you always tell me that." you giggle as he leaves wet, sloppy kisses on your neck.

after giving you a purple hickey, he pulls away and goes back to his original position; him laying down, an arm tightly wrapped around you with your head on his chest, an arm laying across his chest.

"i know," he wants to ask you where you have been, but he knew you were tired so he watched as you close your eyes.

"i love you more, thor." he hears you mumble against his chest.

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