Chapter 17

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Mistake-NF

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Mistake-NF

Walking away from the party, I could feel my heartbeat steadily get louder as I watched my mother walk. An uncomfortable feeling settles in the pit of my stomach and starts to grow. We finally reach a deck in the resort that overlooked the dark beach and stopped. I watch as the waves tumble towards the beach, the cold salty air brushing my face. I turn back to my mother, an impassive look on my face.

"What is it you wanted to talk about?" I ask, unable to keep the hatred from my voice. Her eyes narrow and a frown settles on her lips.

"Are you hell-bent on humiliating me today?" She begins, coming closer to me. "Is that why you came to see me? Is this how you treat your mother after not contacting me for years!? How dare you!"

I already saw this coming and always prepared myself for the possibility that she would speak like this when we finally had a conversation. But the fact that these were the first words that she spoke to me didn't make it hurt less. I shove down my hurt and chuckle instead, my eyes blaring with hate. "Why are you shocked? What were you expecting? To hug you and cry and your shoulders that I missed you. Really?"

"I'm your mother and I will not take this disrespect from you!" She says, raising her voice at me.

"Respect is earned mother." I grit out, clenching my jaw. " Actually, I think it should be freely given. You're mad that I ignored you on your birthday today. I was gone for eighteen years, did it not click on you to check on me? Or were you just glad that I was out of your life?" She opens her mouth to speak but I'm quick to cut her off, already growing agitated. "No, you didn't care at all. I'm sure if I had turned out dead back then you wouldn't bat an eyelid."

"I did what I could. I didn't know where to find you!"

"Don't give me the crap of not knowing where to find me."I snap at her. "How then did your husband know? Suddenly you see my name climb the Forbes list and you want to introduce me to the world as your son. So you can get a Mother of the Year award? And of all people to use to get to me, you chose my ex?!" I can't help the sadistic laughter that breaks from my lips. "Birds of a feather do flock together!"

"You will not speak to me like this! I'm your mother!"

"Why are you even calling yourself that? Ask yourself, Annette, do you deserve that title? Have you done anything to earn it?"

It stuns me how much she continues to feign ignorance, still holding on to her defiance. "I don't know what you're talking about." She mutters, her voice low.

"Of course, you don't. Why should you, you can't possibly remember the hell you put me through or do I have to remind you?"

"You're just imagining it. I never did anything to you. It's all in your head."

The classic narcissistic phrase. I click my tongue, shaking my head. Taking a step forward, I stare her down, watching as she freezes, undertones of fear in her eyes. "It's obvious you've forgotten, so I'll remind you," I say, my voice dropping a few octaves.

"Do you know how many times you told me you wished I had died at birth because you didn't want to raise me? 64 times. I'll know because I counted. The times you screamed at me to get lost. Or when you'll spend hours insulting me because you hated the man who got you pregnant at nineteen and ruined your life so you took it out on me instead, making me miserable so you can feel better. And that's just verbal abuse. Let's not get to physical, emotional, and mental ones. The absolute neglect and carelessness."

A bitter smile works on my face as I continue to speak, unable to stop myself. "And so many times I listened to you, wishing I hadn't been born. Thinking killing myself would be so much better. Suicidal thoughts grew because you fed them. You became my first bully so other bullies had a field day with me." My voice starts to shake as anger overwhelms me and I take more steps forward, tilting her face so she can watch me.

"You did whatever you wanted and I had to settle for scraps. I had to fend for myself. And now you want to have a say in my life. You want to come in like you didn't do anything. Ask yourself, do you have that right?"

She tries to look away but I strengthen my hold and her eyes fill with tears, spilling out. She quickly cleans it off, hiccupping. "You should be lucky I didn't go south. I didn't think of ending your life then and there. You should be thankful I didn't dwell on the hatred and let it eat me out so much that I think murdering you wouldn't be such a bad idea. The only reason you're celebrating this forsaken birthday is because I didn't pull a trigger and watch the bullet travel through your skull."

She shudders at my words and pales. I remove my hands but I'm still close enough. "I left you alone Mom. You did whatever you wanted. Do the same for me, please. Leave me alone. Don't contact me again, and I'm not asking this nicely. You blow up my phone one more time and you try to butt in my life and I'll ruin the only thing that makes you happy to get my revenge. You know what that is." I snarl, venom dripping from my words.

She shivers, pure fear radiating from her body as she stares into my bloodshot eyes. I pull away then, taking a deep breath to calm my raging emotions. "I feel like I've said enough. Anything you would like to add?" She turns mute, her hands shaking. Slowly, she shakes her head. "Good, I'll be taking my leave then."

Rearranging my clothes, I walk past her but stop, Turning back to stare at her. "You know, the least you could do is apologize but instead you're more concerned about being humiliated in front of the people you don't even like. It just shows how misplaced your priorities are." With that, I storm out of the room, leaving her standing there.

I meet my stepfather in the hallway, anxiously walking towards me. He sees me and slows down, quickly searching for his wife. "Is everything okay?" My stepfather asks, looking at me with worry in his eyes.

"I'm sorry but we'll be taking our leave now. I can't stand her."

He looks disappointed but he doesn't push it. " I'll talk to you later," Joan says, holding my hand. I nod, pursing my lips. He pats me on the shoulders before walking away, going in the direction I came. I watch him leave before letting out a ragged breath, feeling deflated. I hope she listens to my warning and stays away. I might not be so composed next time.

My job here is done. I have a wife to get to.

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