"At this point, I'll be grateful for your pieces."
*****
Jessica Franklin is at her wit ends, literally. With two sisters depending on her and a mountain of debts on her neck, she needs a way out before she breaks down...
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We return home safely after which we bid each other goodnight and retire to our bedrooms. Stepping into the dimly lit room, I let out a sigh, my head pounding. Exhausted from the outing, I remove my clothes and contact lens before trudging into the bathroom to have a shower. Turning on the water, I let it run down my body, lost in thought for a while. Strangely, my thoughts are filled with Jessica and our last interaction. She had done a great job pretending to be in love with me, and I think a sick part of me had started to believe those bright smiles were sincere. I had to repeatedly tell myself that it wasn't real. Especially the time when she blushed after I had complimented her, she seemed surprised for some reason. I let out a groan, frowning afterward. Looks like I'm the one breaking my own rules.
I push away the thoughts from my head and finish bathing. Wrapping a towel around my waist, I step out and clean my face with a hand towel before putting on my glasses. I catch myself reflecting in the mirror. A grown man stares back at me but I can still see the traces of the terrified little boy. My eyes darken as memories flood my mind, memories of the abuse I suffered at my mother's hands. I try to push them away, but they are relentless, like a wave crashing against the shore.
Part of me wants to forgive her. After all, she was my mother, the one who brought me into this world. But the scars she left on me run deep, and the pain of her words and actions still lingers.
I remember the times she would lash out at me for the smallest things, her words cutting like a knife. I remember the bruises she left on my body, the fear that consumed me whenever I was near her. I gulp, closing my eyes. I'm no longer that little kid anymore. I won't let her ruin my life like that again. I quickly fish out some new clothes and put them on, combing my hands through my hair to detangle them.
Sitting on the bed, I'm about to lie down when my phone rings and I pick it up. My stepfather's voice rings through and I let out the breath I don't know I was holding.
"Hello, Joan," I say, greeting him.
"Good evening Devon. About time we spoke." He says and my lips twitch. I stand up and begin pacing around the room.
"How are you?'" He asks and I shrug, letting out a sigh.
"Would have been better if she didn't show up and I didn't have to see her," I say, not adding her name.
"About that," he begins slowly. "I apologize. It's just that she started looking for you a while back so I had come up with a meeting. I honestly didn't think she'll speak to you like that. I thought she was going to apologize." He says, his words full of sincerity.
I let out a chuckle but even I know it's not funny. "To think I was expecting that as well," I mumble bitterly.
"Don't blame yourself. It's only natural you'll think that way. Either way, I'm proud of how you managed it. I have talked to her and I think she regrets it."
I shrug. I don't care if she never does. It's none of my business anymore. My brows furrowing, I ask the question that has been bugging me for a while. "To be honest, I don't even know how you stayed in love with her. How did you manage her?"
He chuckles at my question and lets out a sigh at the end. "Well, the heart wants what it wants. You would know, after all, you're married now." He replies and I stiffen. I didn't marry out of love. Isn't that stupid?
"I guess..." I trail off, lost for words.
"Anyway, I'm happy for you. You have a beautiful wife. I wish you a happy married life."
"Thanks." I mutter, feeling somewhat downcast.
"Before I go, is there anything you would like for me to do?" He asks and I tense. The words are stuck in my throat and I'm having a hard time saying them. Taking a deep breath, I let it out anyway.
"My mother, keep her away from me. Or the next time we meet, I might not be so composed." I growl, letting all the dissatisfaction seep to the surface. There is silence at the other line for such a long time, I'm starting to think he wouldn't agree. Soon, I hear a sigh and I can almost see my stepfather nodding.
"I understand. This is the last time you will hear from us." He answers and I'm glad he's so understanding.
"Thank you," I mutter, sincerely this time.
"Live a happy life, Devon." He adds and I nod my head.
"I will do my best," I answer.
The call ends and silence descends. I stare at the phone in my hands before deleting the number and dropping the phone on the bed. Staring at the aquarium in the room, I watch the fishes swim by, oblivious to what's going on in the world. For a split second, I wish I could be like them.
Just keep swimming. The words drift into my mind and I let it settle. I close my eyes, taking in a deep breath before opening them again. The memories will always be there, but maybe, just maybe, they won't control me anymore. . . . I wake up with a start in the middle of the night, feeling unnecessarily parched and my stomach growling with hunger. The familiar urge to run to the kitchen and stuff me with food is overwhelming, overriding my sense of reasoning. These damned cravings. But I knew better than to give in to them. I lay on the bed for a while, hoping the urges will die down eventually but it doesn't happen. My mind keeps wandering to the back of the food. I could almost taste the salty, greasy goodness of chips and the creamy texture of ice cream.
Jumping out of bed, I try to sate my cravings with water but it doesn't work much. Luckily the food I keep in the fridge is just dark chocolates and yogurt but I haven't even had that in a while. And with new people in the house, the fridge is sure to be stuffed. I want to shake it off but I can't keep it in any longer so I make to leave. This one time wouldn't hurt much, I tell myself. I grab my glasses and wear them on, stepping out of the room and walking immediately to the kitchen.
The lights are off so I turn them on and immediately slide into the kitchen, pulling open the fridge. My eyes catch sight of the dark chocolates arranged carefully in the fridge and I take a couple out, dumping them on the kitchen island. I'm about to tear one open and push it into my mouth when I feel the uncanny sensation of someone staring at me. I pause, looking around for whoever it is. I don't find anyone so I continue with my business before my eyes catch something, causing me to jump in fright.
Seating on the stairs was Jessica, a grim look on her face as she stares at me, her lips pursed. The bar of chocolate falls from my hand as I stare back at her, my heart pounding.
What the hell is she doing there?!
**** A short but packed chapter, hopefully the next one makes up for it!!! What do you think? Let me know!! See you in the next chapter 🙈🙈😘
