CHAPTER 14 - "I still love you."

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               I stand at the opposite of the Iron Throne. Both attractive and terrifying, it awaits me. I also wait for someone to accompany me to the throne, to Joffrey. My father is still locked up, my brother is far from here, Tywin Lannister must be somewhere on a battlefield. So, I have to move on alone.

               I've felt alone before, almost every second since we arrived in King's Landing. The only thing that made me happy was Littlefinger. When I reach his height, he slightly lowers his head. He shows no emotion that would make me believe that he once really loved me.

               I arrive at the steps leading to the throne and turn my head to Sansa. Since yesterday, she has refused to speak to me. I think she will still be mad at me for a while, but she will eventually understand that I am doing this primarily to protect her.

               To help me climb the stairs, Varys takes my hand, allowing me to take my dress in the other. I thank him with a small smile.

               This dress is more golden than ivory. The goldthread embroidered patterns depict lions, deer, but no wolves. Cersei won a first battle. I would have preferred to stay away from her, but now that war is declared, there is no way to retreat.

               Joffrey gives me his best smile by taking my hand in his. He is proud to marry me, and I cannot complain. If he's in love with me, it'll give me some security.

               «The Rains of Castamere» resound in the throne room. This song is, so to speak, the hymn of the House Lannister. It recounts the victory of Tywin against the Reyne house. It was the first great victory of the man called the «Great Lion of Rock». It is also another affront that I am forced to take without flinching.

               Joffrey puts his cape on my shoulders, symbol of his protection. I take a deep breath, hoping to stop the time but the nightmare continues. We both turn to the Great Septon that binds our hands with a thin strip of fabric in the colors of our two houses. Finally, a little recognition.

"Let it be said that Diana of the houses Stark and Tully, and Joffrey of the houses Lannister and Baratheon" announces the Septon. "Now form only one pulpit, one heart, one soul."

               When I hear these words, my breathing suddenly accelerates. This detail had escaped me, or perhaps I had intentionally omitted it: I will have to spend the rest of my life with Joffrey.

               Once our hands are loose, Joffrey takes mine in his. It's like he wants to keep in touch with me. Surprisingly, as I started to panic, it reassures me.

"Cursed are those who seek to tear them from each other" the Great Septon ends.

               Joffrey turns to the incalculable number of guests who made the trip at a record speed. Petyr's expression has not changed, he is stoic, impassive in the face of this situation more than disastrous for him as for me. We are now separated forever and even though I hate him, my whole-body screams at me to throw myself in his arms.

               I'm gonna spend the rest of my life locked up here with Joffrey and Cersei, a wolf in a lion's ass. I will never see Robb, Bran, Rickon or Jon again. I will never go back north.

               I barely hear Joffrey announce that he is preparing to kiss me, my ears are clogged, I am terrified. When the king's lips touch mine, I feel the earth shaking beneath my feet as my heart rate soars. I put my hand on Joffrey's arm to hold on to him but feel that he is already clinging to me.

               This tremor is not just the effect of my fear on my body, it is real. I detach myself from my new husband and notice that all the guests are either on the floor, or stand by each other, or are simply disoriented.

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