Hear me Roar - English version

CHAPTER 16 - "Only when we are alone."

               My father died a week ago now. Every day here is longer than the previous one. Anger has taken precedence over sadness, leaving what I was behind. Nothing must hinder this quest for revenge, this survival.

               Since that fateful day, Joffrey likes to torment Sansa. For some reason, he leaves me alone. I guess my turn will come. Joffrey also has other hobbies that I prefer to ignore. Like, for example, cutting the tongues of the bards who come to sing to him the stories of Robert's victories.

               These people who wanted so much to give justice will soon realize that they have cut off the head of the wrong lord.

♐︎

               The door to my room opens wide and my husband enters. He always has that smug smile that makes me regret most of my life choices.

               Arrow, lying on the bed, throws himself at his feet to receive caresses. I would love to be an animal and not realize what's going on around me.

"Diana" he tells me as if it was the first time I'm called by that name. "I have great news!"

"Majesty" I answer with my head slightly down.

"Pack your things, you're leaving this room!"

"I'm afraid I don't understand."

"You're coming to live in mine!"

               I look at the Hound to make sure I understand. He answers me with a shrug. Again, he looks completely overwhelmed by events.

"Are you sure?" I ask. "My period of grief is not over..."

"Of course it is. Why would you grieve? Your father was a traitor. Enough!"

               The king kicks Arrow, who immediately shows her teeth. She is attached to him. She became attached to the person he claimed to be until our wedding, the one he had created to make sure I wouldn't run away.

               The wolf comes next to me, as if to protect me. She now understands that Joffrey is not a friend.

"All right, Majesty. My things will be moved to your quarters."

"And I don't want your guns in our room" Joffrey adds before he leaves.

               Once the king has left the room, I kneel to check on Arrow. She's sturdy, she's a giant wolf from the north of the Wall. A blow from the frailest man of the Seven Kingdoms shouldn't destabilize her any more than that.

               I caress her gently, looking at the sword against the wall. This blade comes from the North, it's the one and only thing – apart from the Arrow – that reminds me of where I come from. I can't get rid of it, or my bow, for that matter.

               I have to hide them in an easily accessible place in case a fight breaks out.

♐︎

               I grab my bow, arrows and sword and get out of my room.

               My options are limited. I could hand them over to Sansa, but I can't leave her in possession of those kinds of weapons. I could bring them to Baelish except I don't trust him anymore and he doesn't live in the Red Keep. My last option opens and, surprised, Varys lets me in. I wait for him to close the door to say anything. These days, no corner of this castle is safe.

"Majesty, what is this visit worth to me?" asks the eunuch. "And what is all this?"

"These are my weapons" I answer. "The showiest. Joffrey wants me to move my things to his apartments except, as you understand, all the things that could be used to kill him."

"So, you want me to keep them for you."

"You are quick."

               I put them on the table.

"I can't part with it" I explain. "And I trust you."

"I appreciate the trust you have in me" says Varys. "But I wouldn't know what to do with it."

"Nothing. Hide them. No one will ever come and search your room and you don't know how to use it."

"I understand your choice. They will be safe."

               Without further ado, I store the various weapons in strategic places of the room, where no one would think to look.

"Why didn't you bring them to your good friend Littlefinger?"

               Lying under the bed, I get my head out so I can see if Varys is serious. He knows what Petyr did, he was in cahoots with him, he must know that I would never trust him again. However, what surprises me the most is that he is aware of our little affairs.

"Lord Baelish and I are not friends" I answer. "We will never be friends again. I do not forgive betrayal."

"So, you had to be very close to see it as a betrayal."

               I get up and dust my dress.

"Don't play this game with me, Varys... Pretending not to know is good for women, I'm sure you know many other manipulation techniques that do not make you look simple-minded."

"What I know I haven't seen with my own eyes, so I can't swear it's true."

"These eyes belong to you" I object.

               I am beginning to know the lords of the Council well and, especially after the betrayal of Baelish, I have learned to see beyond what they want to tell me.

"Lord Baelish and I don't..."

"The King, like all of us, saw him take your hand on the day of..."

"I don't remember, I cut it off. I don't know what King Joffrey saw but he's wrong."

               I go to the exit to escape this conversation that will never go my way. When my hand lands on the handle, I hear Varys' sarcastic voice behind me: «You could use an avoidance technique that does not make you look simple-minded».

♐︎

               My luggage was brought to my new room. Joffrey stands in the middle of the room to give directions to the maids who are busy around him.

               I'm starting to understand why he wanted me to move in with him. He wants to keep an eye on me.

               Our cohabitation can have good and bad. This will help me to tighten my "grip" on him – although this word is excessive – which is positive. Joffrey must think I'm crazy in love with him. However, it will give him an opportunity to reiterate what he did on our wedding day, which is more than negative.

               Arrow stands beside me. She who loved Joffrey so much now refuses to approach him. I hope that she will still agree to sleep in the same room as us, she would ensure my protection.

"Your Majesty, you can dismiss these ladies, I'll take care of the rest myself."

               After I said this, all the maids leave the room with eagerness. For a reason that «I do not know» they do not appreciate the company of the king.

"Are you sure, my lady? The Hound can handle it for you."

"Don't worry, I'll unpack my things alone."

               I approach him and take his arm before putting a kiss on his cheek.

"I think I already told you to call me by my first name."

"Dog! Get out!"

"Arrow, follow him."

               The Hound and the Wolf leave the room after giving me one last glance. I suspect that Clegane knows what happened on our wedding day.

"Can I call you by your first name?" I ask my husband.

"Of course, only when we are alone."