Letters to Harry

Chapter 9

Dear Harry

How are you? How's your break? Hope you are winding down from the tour with your family.

It's crazy to think of why all of Directioners the fans, are madly in love with you. I don't know how you've become famous and it's hard to see and get to know you personally.

I guess you'll freak out if you are reading these letters. But I don't know somehow these letters are my get away of my everything.

My real life I guess.

It's like I somehow my find strength in these letters and the words that I typed out to you.

You'd probably don't even know that these letters exists.

I know you'd probably have problems with your own that we all don't know.

All of us have.

But I just hope that these letters would mean something to you. Like helping you in some way.

I don't know what happen today or the past three days, since the fight with my boyfriend.

I was like floating in the bubbles and there's no one there to catch it. I cried hard feeling this pain in my chest saying to Him that I have given up my relationship with my long term boyfriend, but at the same time there's a huge doubt in my heart sayings no, I can't let him go. And half of it were questioning about the authentic of the voice that says 'You are my soulmate'

I'm confused. It's like I'm losing my directions. I don't know what to do.

I prayed to Him asking God if this voice's real please show me the way or something but if its not then help me to find another purpose.

As days went by, after that prayers, I don't know why somehow my decision of not taking one of the plans that lead me to you this year kind of affects that voices.

It's like you are fading away from this life journey. But i keep telling my self I guess I can't push it and let it all happen the way it should be.

So I decided to just let that voice go.

That voice that tells me 'You are my soulmate' and the effort of pushing that thing to happen go.

Because I feel like I've been pushing it hard. Like getting a makeup diploma in my last six months of semester so I could move to England by August 2015 and somehow be there for you in your community.

It's sounded like I try hard and pushing it too far. I guess if we are really a soulmate, made for each other, God will put us in the direction where we both meet up and talk / be friends / best friends to each other.

Despite of right now, we don't know each other yet.

I decided to let the effort of pushing it hard go. Even though I know it would still be there in my heart. But I have a journey of my self to carry that on. And I would let everything happen naturally.

Just like what He says to me at the first place. It's a long journey in my life and you being my final journey in my life path.

I think I would just want to focus on my last semester right now. My last 6 months of it before I get my degree. That's the plan for now.

I don't know what else will come up. But I will keep writing these letters. I hope you don't mind with that.

I'd like to think that you are reading these so whenever I'm sad, I could just write you a letter. :)

I hope you are well there in England.

If you ever find these letters, I hope somehow reminded you that you are not alone and that despite of all my problems I'm also here for you x

Love,

Vx