a place we know| ✓

seventeen

"And find a place where every single thing you see tells you to stay."
S E E K E R
.
.
December 25th
3:41 PM
New York
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Audrey and Gunner returned home but it didn't quite feel the same without Leah.

They left her in tears when a kind woman told them their visitation was over. It was hard trying to convince Leah that they'd be back after their court hearing at the end of the month. All Audrey wanted was to bring her daughter home. However, she and Gunner walked out of the building having forgotten a piece of themselves.

It was Christmas, the worst one they had yet. Audrey couldn't help but wonder what her family was doing back in Denver. There was no doubt her mother had over-decorated the tree like she did every year, and each time she would work with a new theme. Six years ago it had been silver and gold, and Audrey was curious as to what it was this year.

There would be stockings hung over the fireplace, each bearing the name of a family member. Then underneath the Christmas tree would be more presents than she could count. Her younger cousins going on about Santa Claus, their parents playing along with their little charade, and snow. Lots of it.

Audrey remembered the snowman she built with her brother when she was still a child up until he moved out to start college. They made it a tradition.

Perhaps her father had finally bought her brother the car he used to ask for, maybe he was sitting in front of the fireplace with her aunts and uncles and cousins, pretending that the shirt his wife bought him was definitely what he wanted and praising her for knowing his taste so well. She was sure he bought her more charms for her silver bracelet, it was also a tradition.

Audrey had one too, but she hadn't worn it since she left them to be with Gunner. The last charm she received was of the moon. The stars need the moon, Audrey. The same way your mother and I need you. His words brought tears to her eyes then.

They still do now.

"What's wrong, Audrey?"

Everything, she wanted to scream, but her words were lost among the pitiful thoughts swirling her mind. "Nothing, I'm just tired. It's been a really long day."

Gunner held the entrance door open for her when they arrived at the apartment building. It made her miss her old house even more.

"I think I might go back to Penelope's house," she said in a small and teary voice. "She's been waiting for me all day."

He pushed the elevator button, but it looked as though the gloom of the winter weather outside tangled itself within his heartstrings, painting his face with melancholy. "You can stay a couple more hours, I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

Audrey shook her head. "I have to go, Gunner. I don't live here anymore, remember?"

"I know." His eyes slid over to her and assessed her for a reaction. "That doesn't mean you can't stay a while longer. I just...I need you here. Please."

"Gunner, I really can't. It's not good for us."

"It's Christmas, Audrey. Please stay," he muttered. "I don't want to go up there and drink away all my feelings. I want something real. I'll use if you go and neither of us wants that."

Audrey was sapped of energy. It felt like he was giving her an ultimatum to which there was a clear choice. "You don't have to use, okay? I'll go up with you."