a place we know| ✓

eighteen

"And find a place where every single thing you see tells you to stay."
S E E K E R
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December 28th
12:12 PM
New York
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The room was filled with the sounds of shuffling papers and the clicking of heels on the polished marble floor. 

Audrey felt small and insignificant in the grandeur of the courtroom. Her palms were slick with sweat, and she fidgeted with her hands, twisting her fingers around each other in a nervous dance. It seemed as though the eyes of the entire courtroom were upon her, and she couldn't shake the feeling that she was being condemned, not just by the judge and the CPS caseworkers and associates, but by everyone in the room.

She shifted in her seat, her black jeans and grey sweater contrasting starkly with the professional attire worn by the lawyers and CPS workers around her. She had tried her best to dress appropriately, but her limited means had left her with no other option. She was obviously out of place and inadequate, and it only added to the nervousness that was already gnawing at her insides. She couldn't afford legal aid and had to present herself, which was now looking like a bad idea because she didn't stand a chance against CPS, not without money and resources. To them, she was a pest hardly worth their time and effort, but because of the law, they had to give her a fair trial to attempt to win back custody of her daughter. 

The worst part of this wasn't sitting here in a courtroom listening to legal jargon, but the fact that Gunner was nowhere to be found. She had put all her faith in him, believing that he would show up and support her in her time of need. But as she looked around the room, she saw no sign of him. This was Leah they were fighting for, yet he hadn't remembered... he hadn't deemed it important enough to appear in front of the judge.

Audrey was truly alone now, but she'd fight for her daughter. She'd walk through gunfire for Leah.

"Ms. Rahal, according to the report by CPS you have had a neglected child in your custody. Leah Shaw, correct?"

"That's correct," Audrey answered, her voice hoarse. "But your honor, she wasn't neglected. I took care of her."

The man pushed his glasses up his crooked nose. His eyes, blue and electrifying, turned her to stone. She stole quick glances at the associates who remained as cold as the judge himself. Audrey withered under their scrutiny; they all believed she was a horrible mother --which she convinced herself that she wasn't, but she was losing that internal battle with herself.

"The CPS report is indicted, Ms. Rahal," the judge went on to explain. "Do you know what that means?"

She shook her head, then hurriedly realized that they were awaiting her verbal answer. "No, sir."

"Since you are named as a subject in this CPS report, your name and your common-law's name will appear on the Statewide Central Register of Child Abuse and Maltreatment until Leah Shaw turns 28."

Shivering involuntarily, her moist eyes swept over all the callous faces in the room as she clenched her hands in her lap. She knew that showing any weakness in front of the judge would only make things worse.

"But that doesn't necessarily mean you will be charged."

She didn't breathe, afraid she would start crumbling, but held his gaze as she waited for his next words. 

"CPS has filed a neglect petition. They are convinced Leah must be removed from your care."

"Your honor, I can assure you Leah was doing fine in our care."

"Drugs were seized at your apartment, were they not, Ms. Rahal?"

The judge's eyes bore into her, and she felt a lump form in her throat. She tried to speak, but the words stuck in her mouth. The room was stifling, and she could barely breathe. He had the police reports in front of him and sorted through each and every one of them, calmly prepared for her response. "Yes, your honor."