a place we know| ✓

fifty three

"And find a place where every single thing you see tells you to stay."
S E E K E R
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February 4th
11:23 PM
New York
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"You've been quiet since he left."

Tucker's room was tranquil, keeping time at a stand still as Audrey stood in front of the foggy window. Misted by the frozen air, it blurred the city behind it, lights on towering sky scrapers and the hanging moon glowing in the far distance.

"Just thinking," her eyes were transfixed by the flurries of white snowflakes that dusted the city. "Nothing important."

"What did he say?" Tucker couldn't be seen in the glass as the condensation only thickened. His hands settled on her waist, nose tickling her ear. She was conflicted, succumbing to the comfort he provided, but with Gunner's voice lingering in the back of her mind, wanting to withdraw.

"We just said goodbye to each other."

"That doesn't sound like something to be worried about."

On the contrary, she wasn't able to process any of what Gunner had said. Her world came to a standstill, where the slightest beat of her heart proved nescient to her body; ignorant of how her own circulating blood felt like poison in her veins, destroying her at the finest level. Hours ago, he appeared at the door, housing the expectation that she would somehow rewind time and transport them to the days when life and love were much kinder. In lieu, they had sundered like bone, crippled beyond repair.

"I'm not worried," Audrey said in self-assurance. Tucker didn't need the same degree of convincing she did.

"Then why're you sulking?" His arms wrapped around her abdomen and her back rested against his front. His heartbeat was powerful, grip unyielding. As he breathed, she counted the rising and falling chest and followed it akin to a simple song. In and out, mimicking his method. "If he said something that hurt you, tell me."

"Like I told you, we said goodbye to each other. We ended it for good."

"You don't look glad that he's gone." She detected a shift in him. Where once his arms were set to console, they winded around her, a cage. And although his reflection was undefined in the window, endearment was lost on him. He kissed her cheek, but his lips were cold.

"This was what you wanted, Audrey," Tucker said.

"I guess so."

"You have to stop being so indecisive. Remember when I said I'd give you a hundred. You're not doing the same for me."

He had proven that he deserved a hundred, more than, even. But she was in two places in both mind and soul, holding tightly to a piece of her that dwindled like a flame in the wind. Until she found peace, Audrey didn't have enough to give Tucker, not when she didn't have enough herself.

"There's a lot I haven't figured out yet." She pivoted around, hands held to his chest meant to create space between them, though enjoying the warmth that seeped through her fingers when he grasped her wrists. "I'm trying, but–"

"You left the guy and he came to say goodbye to you, now you're suddenly rethinking everything."

"I haven't rethought anything yet. If you would just let me explain–"