billie eilish imagines🧚🏼‍♀️🌈

i miss you like crazy but you'll never know that

Billie and I broke up a couple months ago. Ever since then, I have been living in hell. Everyday I have the same routine, get up, cry when I don't see her beside me, eat breakfast, cry because I have no one to eat with...you know the rest.

I've been a complete mess.

But she broke up with me and said "we needed a break" whatever that means.

I blocked her on everything the second I got home from her place that night.

I told myself I would never go back.

Yeah I was a mess but I still had pride and  I'm NEVER going to ask someone to love me.

Now that I've caught you up, here's the other day.

——

I was laying on my couch, ice cream tub on my chest and a spoon in my mouth. -all while watching crazy rich Asians.

This is what my days consisted of, usually, but today was different.

I felt my phone vibrate beside my hand and picked it up, seeing the caller id was a good friend of mine.

Elijah.

I pressed on the green button and brought my phone up to my ear.

"Hello", Elijah said.

"Yo", I replied.

"We gonna come pick you up and take you out. I don't care what you say. You need to get out", he said sternly.

"No thanks eli.... I don't really feel like doing anything today".

"You say that every time y/n. You need to move on eventually and stop wasting ur time in front of a tv".

I looked around in reality that I was really living in a garbage can.

I sighed before giving in and hanged up on him.

I got up and placed the ice cream tub back in the freezer, for later, and picked up all my tissues and water bottles and threw everything away.

I went into my room and examined myself in the huge mirror I have.

After I realized how terrible I looked which DEFINITELY ruined my self confidence, I went into my bathroom that is connected to my room and washed my face.

I decided to do my whole skin care routine since I was looking extra rough.

I then decided the knots in my hair where too big and the only way to detangle them was by taking a shower so I turned on the faucet and stripped naked, hopping in.

After I shampooed and conditioned my hair, I noticed my horrible leg hair but didn't care too much since pants exist.

I took my towel and wrapped it around my body and made my way into my room.

I just picked a basic outfit; an oversized Harley Davidson t-shirt, some black jeans, and my checkered vans.

I finished getting dressed and decided that instead of blow drying my hair I would just put it into a ponytail.

After spraying some perfume and grabbing my bag, I went and sat in my living room and waited for eli to show up, since he never told me when he'd be here.

After 10 minutes I get an incoming call from Elijah saying he was out front.

I grabbed my keys and locked my door and walked outside of my house to see a Jeep in front of my drive away.

I saw no one sitting next to Elijah so I took that as I could call shotgun.

"Yo", I said kinda happy to see such a familiar face.

"Missed you y/n", he said giving me a hug once I sat in the vehicle.

I put my seatbelt on and eli started to drive off.

I heard some noises coming from the back and me being me looked around because I'm nosey.

Once I looked behind, I saw her immediately.

She was sitting in the right window seat.

She was with Zoe and some other guy.

My face instantly dropped down when I realized, I couldn't kiss her anymore.

I couldn't hold her hands anymore.

I couldn't hug her anymore.

I couldn't love her anymore.

I sighed looking forward, she broke up with me, was the only thing I was hearing.