I'm Not Her

Chapter 4: I'm Not Being the "Normal" Perrie

Chapter 4:

Zayn had dropped me off back at Perrie's flat which I guess I could call mine now. She had said that everything hers was now mine. He and the rest of his band had to go somewhere. I wasn't exactly clear on the details. Eleanor went to hang out with some friends and asked me if I'd like to come along, but I rejected the invitation. I was going to try and reach Perrie over Skype. I was already dying- not literally, but I was overwhelmed. These were Perrie's friends. I felt like that awkward nobody that was sitting at the cool kids' table at school.

I logged on and went through my contact list.  I didn't even know what time zone Perrie was in- that would've helped tremendously. For all I knew, it could be three in the morning where she was. I wish she had left me with more details about her whereabouts.

Please be on. Please be on. Please be on. 

Sure enough there was a little green check mark next to Perrie's name. Thank God. I needed to talk to her. I immediately clicked her name to video call her. After a bit, a familiar face appeared on the screen. 

"Hey!" She squealed. Her face was for once free of any makeup. I thought she was pretty without it anyways. She was a natural beauty...but whenever she was free from makeup, she looked good. I just looked like I was a zombie. An unattractive one at that. Her blonde hair was tied up into a loose bun, with strands sticking out in random places. She seemed to be on a bed with her legs in the air behind her. I could vaguely see a window in the room. Outside was a clear sky and an ocean with waves crashing onto the shore. Hm...somewhere tropical probably.

"Hi Perrie," I sighed, "I just hung out with Zayn and the rest of the boys today. I met Eleanor  as well. We went to Nando's." 

"Yay! Aren't they the best?" 

"It was awkward for me and a bit overwhelming...but I also learned something else Perrie." I confessed. 

"What? Has Eleanor been spilling secrets? That girl..." Perrie chuckled, "I love that girl. She's always happy and looks at things in a brighter light. Plus, she's as funny as Louis. The two of them are perfect and it's just adorable."

"No Perrie." I groaned. "I know you're not dating Zayn for real! I know it's fake! How come you didn't tell me? This just makes things a lot harder on my part." 

Perrie was silent and her eyes went from her laptop's camera down to her keyboard. She sighed. "I guess he would've mentioned that sometime...I just hoped it wouldn't be this soon. After all, it's like your first day..."

"Perrie! Why are you even doing this? It's wrong! If you don't like him in a romantic way, you might as well just leave it," I told her. "Is this a reason why you left? You thought I could do better at liking him or something? Because you're wrong!"

"I can't just get out of it Pen," Perrie said, "I wish it was that easy. I signed a contract to date him to promote both bands, but clearly One Direction doesn't really need any more attention. Little Mix's manager told us that one person had to date him. We played rock, paper, scissors and-"

"You suck at that game Perrie." I finished. It was true, I always won against her and she always yelled at me because she was convinced I was cheating. Was there even a way you could cheat? Well, she was just so bad, she told herself I was cheating to make herself feel better about her rock, paper, scissors skills. I just thought it was a game of luck, but unfortunately, luck was never on Perrie's side when it came towards rock, paper, scissors.

"Exactly. I had to date him and make it look believable and if I don't...who knows what will happen! I need to make it believable, but the thing is that I can't! And yes, that is kind of the reason I put you into this position...You're better at liking people than me," Perrie exclaimed, "you always try your best to like people, even if you really don't want to. I can't do that. I can't love him!"