Torn 🤎 (Completed)

Chapter 19: Crossroads

Zane ♠️

Alicia called me earlier in the week and asked if I wanted to go to a place called Xtreme Action Park in downtown Fort Lauderdale. Apparently, it was an indoor entertainment venue that offered a host of different activities such as laser tag, bowling, rollerblading, and Go-karting. At first I didn't really feel like going to something like that, but then she told me Mia would be there and those were the magic words. Alicia knew damn well that I was a sucker for Mia.

Yes, I knew that I told Mia that her chances with me were over and in that moment, I meant every damn word that I'd said to her. Ever since leaving Tanisha, I was the kind of man that didn't play games when it came to my heart. When I made up my mind, there was never any going back.

But that mentality waivered when my ex-girlfriend showed up randomly yesterday. When my eyes landed on Tanisha, my first thought was how do I flee this scene without falling victim to her antics. And when Mia tried to help out, I wasn't an idiot. I knew exactly what Mia was trying to do but at the same time I was pissed off at her earlier comment about Jared.

Somehow one thing led to another and I found myself putting on a show for Tanisha while kissing the hell out of Mia. I would be lying if I said I didn't want Tanisha to be jealous. And so, I took the opportunity that was in front of me. I kissed Mia and I enjoyed every moment of exploring her plump soft lips. After I did it, I realized that, even though kissing Mia felt fucking amazing, it was the wrong move because of the motive behind it. Plus, if I wanted to keep up my resolve to not chase her, kissing her was sending her the wrong message. But the more I thought about Mia, the more I felt a pull towards her and it scared me that she might be the death of me. Additionally, a part of me relished in the fact that I could affect her even though Mia was so adamant about not catching feelings for me. In that moment yesterday, when I gazed at Mia, I could see and feel an overwhelming amount of emotions swimming in her hooded eyes. I could observe the emotions that she was trying to lock away and stay hidden. I knew what Mia's problem was and it was that she couldn't reconcile how she might be feeling for me with her preconceived ideas of who she thought I should be. Was she worth trying to fix? I couldn't answer that yet.

I didn't know where Mia and I would be in the future or if I was even willing to change my stance on giving us a viable chance. But, I did know that there was something strong pulling me towards the woman, even against my better judgement, and it made me believe that there was something worth exploring between us.

However, when I thought back to Tanisha just showing up out of the blue, I couldn't help but worry. For some reason, I've always regressed and gone back to Tanisha regardless of my common sense or what people have told me. I loved that woman so deeply for so long that at one point I thought I had no life without her. Tanisha was wicked because she knew the power that she held over me. And although it's been years since I've seen her, the moment I saw her beautiful face again, I felt the slight tug from the chains that she locked around my heart all those years ago. It scared the hell out of me because I thought I'd removed that bondage a long time ago when I walked out of her life. And since seeing her, that pull to be with her had gotten worse because she was texting me nonstop since yesterday. I had so many questions... How did Tanisha find me? Why did she suddenly show up? What were her plans? Did she want me back? Would I have the willpower NOT to entertain her? Those were all valid questions that I didn't have any answers too yet.