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12

Harry

Another typical Saturday. He was at his favorite gay club scanning the place to find someone to take home for the night. He had been doing the same thing every other Saturday since he moved out of their apartment and out of Louis's life for good. He found someone for the night, fucked them (always, he refused to bottom), and left. He didn't want anything serious, he just wanted to feel less empty and alone for a while.

He went up to the bar and ordered a beer. This was always easier if he was a bit tipsy.
"Harry? Oh my God, it is you!" Someone said and he turned around just to be face to face with his tormentor in high school Leo.

"Leo?"

"Yeah hi, I was hoping I would run into you one day. Can we talk?" Leo asked.

Leo in a gay club? No fucking way!
"Do you know what kind of club this is?"

"Of course." Leo chuckled as they walked between tables to find somewhere to sit. Leo stopped at an empty table and sat down. He gestured for Harry to take a seat so he did. Leo looked at him.
"I'm gay."

Harry started to laugh.
"That's fucking hilarious. You tormented me in high school."

"I know, and I'm so sorry about that. Truly. I had a really hard time accepting my own sexuality and I took it out on you. I'm really sorry Harry. You didn't deserve that. Can you forgive me?" Leo pleaded.

Harry did what he did best. He went home with Leo and fucked him hard. Hearing Leo scream from lust when he impaled him with his cock felt satisfaction like he got his revenge for what he did to him in high school. Afterward, he just felt dirty and he couldn't get out of his apartment fast enough.

He had to stop living his life like this. It had been a year since they broke up. He needed to get a grip and move on. He was starting a new job in a week as a sound engineer at a record label. It was his dream job and he was really excited about it. Louis would have been equally excited and proud. He missed him so much and he hated himself every day for not communicating better and flirting with someone else instead. That was such a shitty move that he would regret for the rest of his life.

He felt lost without Louis, like he didn't know who he was anymore. He had to do better. He had to stop sleeping around just to fill that hole in his chest. It was clearly not working. He only felt disgusted about himself. He didn't know who he was but this wasn't him. Maybe he should try and date? Just the thought of it made him wanna puke.

His new job was as exciting as he had hoped it would be. He got to spend his days in the studio recording great artists. It was a small record label and the artists signed to it were looking for their big break. The owner, Liam Payne was just a couple of years older than him and he was a great guy. They started to hang out, grabbed a beer once in a while or a dinner. It wasn't dating, just friendship. Liam was straight.

He needed friends. Life felt a bit better. Liam introduced him to his best friend Zayn and they all started to hang out on the weekends, which meant he stopped picking up men at bars for a one-night stand.

Niall called one night. He hadn't talked to him in a while and he realized how much he had missed him. Niall had moved back to Ireland after College. After they had gotten through the basic conversation topics Niall got to the reason he was calling.
"Louis' mum is sick, did you know that?"

Harry's heart dropped. He loved Jay.
"No, I haven't talked to Louis at all since we broke up, you know that."

"Yeah, you've been busy screwing half of London. Seriously Haz?" Niall snorted.

Harry gasped. It wasn't like Niall to talk like that.
"What the fuck? Don't you dare judge me." Harry growled, feeling hurt.

"I'm sorry. I guess I'm still mad at both of you for breaking up." Niall muttered.

"That's between me and Louis. How bad is it with Jay?" Harry asked.

"Bad. She has cancer, leukemia. She's not gonna make it. Louis is devastated. You know how much he loves his mum." Niall sighed.

"That's horrible. I wish there's something I could do." Harry answered.

"You could be there for him. Nobody knows him better than you do. He needs you." Niall replied.

"I...He wouldn't want me there. I hurt him Ni." Harry said.

"Time heals and he's really in pain now. Just give it a try." Niall answered.

They talked some more before they hung up. Niall had told him that Louis still lived in their old apartment. That surprised him. He thought that Louis would have wanted to get as far away from that place as possible. It must remind him of them and their time together. Niall had also told him that Louis had been going back and forth between London and his job and his family in Doncaster. Last, but not least he had pointed out that Louis was still single and had been since they broke it off. He didn't know what he should do with that information. That only made him feel like a slut. Hopefully he wasn't the only one who got through their breakup using sex as a coping mechanism but on the other hand, he didn't want to think that Louis slept with someone else. He was such a hypocrite.

He thought about it for a day and a half before he grabbed his car keys and drove over to the very familiar address. He sat in his car for a solid twenty minutes before he had built up the courage to knock on his old apartment door, not knowing how his own reaction would be when he finally saw Louis again. Not knowing how Louis would react.