Versions

20

"Congratulation dad!" Anne answered and he burst out crying immediately.

"What's wrong Louis?" Anne asked, sounding surprised and worried at the same time.

"Harry doesn't think I'm a good dad." Louis sobbed.

"What? Did he say that? That must be a misunderstanding sweetie." Anne answered.

"No, he didn't say that, yet, but he won't let me hold him or feed him or anything really. He won't talk to me about it. How did I screw this up already?" Louis wailed.

"There must be a logical explanation for his behavior. I'll talk to him." Anne promised.

They hung up and Louis stayed in the bedroom where he had been hiding out all day. He cried into the pillow to muffle the sound.

In the meantime, Harry answered a phone call from his mum.
"Hi mum, oh God, Miles is perfect! I love him so much. He's amazing."

"I can't wait to see him. Harry? What is going on with you and Louis?" Anne asked.

"What do you mean?" Harry asked confused.

"Don't you trust him with Miles?" Anne asked.

"Of course!" Harry immediately answered.

"Why won't you let him take care of Miles?" Anne questioned.

"I....what do you mean?" Harry asked.

"Louis called me and cried. I know that it's overwhelming to become a parent but you're not a single dad Harry and you're not letting Louis be a dad. You have to let him in sweetie." Anne said.

"I didn't realize..." Harry gasped and felt awful.

"Stop hogging the baby and apologize to your husband, now!" Anne demanded.

"Of course!" Harry promised.

He brought Miles with him and walked to the bedroom.
"Lou? Are you crying?" He asked softly.

"Y..yoo-ou think I-I'm a lo-ousy dad." Louis sobbed.

"No love, I think you're an amazing dad. I'm so sorry Lou." Harry answered and teared up. He sat down on the bed and stroked Louis' hair.

Louis turned around to look at him with a tear-drenched face that broke Harry's heart.
"You won't let me near him. He's my son too and I love him, Harry, I promise. Why won't you let me take care of him? What did I do wrong?"

"Oh God, I'm so, so sorry. You did nothing wrong. This is all on me. I didn't even realize that I cut you off. Here, please hold him." Harry said and handed him the baby.

Louis immediately sat up and took Miles in his arms and a smile spread over his face as soon as he looked at him. Harry felt ashamed of himself and had to explain.
"Ever since I held him for the first time I've been terrified. I'm so scared that something will happen to him. I watch him breathe every night. More than 200 babies die in the UK every year from sudden infant death syndrome. I'm so afraid that our son will be one of them." Harry said and started bawling.

"Oh Haz." Louis sighed and put an arm around him.

"And it's not just that. I'm afraid to take him to the park. He could get kidnapped, or hurt himself on the playground, and don't get me started on all the germs. He could get sick." Harry continued. As soon as he started talking about it everything just came pouring out of him.

Louis listened patiently before he answered.
"I understand that you are scared love, so am I but we can't lock him inside this house his whole childhood."

"Sure we can." Harry pouted.

"I want him to have a happy childhood. I want him to laugh while we push him on a swing, I want him to be able to explore under supervision of course. I want him to play with friends and learn how to ride a bike and play football. He will fall and skin his knees but he will get up again. He will be sick and we will take care of him. We will protect him Hazza, but not from living." Louis said softly.

"Yeah, I want that too. Of course I do." Harry answered.

"Good, and together we will do our absolute best to make sure that he's safe and happy." Louis smiled.

"I love you. I'm really sorry that I hogged the baby as my mum put it. Did you have to call her?" Harry chuckled.

"I would have called my own mum if she was still here. I was desperate." Louis said with a sad smile.

"Oh Lou, I know you miss your mum. You can always call mine." Harry promised.

"She would have loved to be a grandma." Louis sighed.

"I know." Harry smiled sadly.

"I think I read somewhere that there's a breathing alarm you can put in the crib. I'll buy one first thing tomorrow and we're moving the crib in here as well. Do you think you can sleep then? You need to sleep Haz." Louis said softly.

"Yeah, that could work. Thanks, Lou! You're the best!" Harry beamed.

"I wish you had told me sooner. You haven't slept much in a week." Louis said.

Miles woke up with a scream.
"That's his I'm wet and hungry scream." Harry smiled.

"I'll take care of him. You lay down and get some rest. You must be exhausted, love." Louis said, looking concerned.

Harry only hesitated for a second.
"That would be awesome actually. I'm beat."

Louis gave him a quick kiss before he got up from the bed and carried Miles to his nursery. He made sure to close the door to their bedroom behind him so Harry could sleep. He changed his diaper and smiled the whole time.

He went down to the kitchen to make a bottle of formula and took a seat in the living room when it was ready. He fed Miles and their son held his tiny hand around his index finger the whole time and his heart melted.

Harry slept for hours and Louis just sat there admiring Miles. He was so beautiful. His head was covered in fluffy hair in the same color as his own but it looked like he was getting green eyes and he loved that. Harry had amazing eyes.

The next day he went and bought the breathing alarm and they moved the crib to their bedroom. Harry could actually sleep at night and they took turns getting up when Miles was awake. He went back to work but Harry sent him videos every day and as soon as he came home he took care of Miles. Harry finally shared parenthood with him and it was amazing.