His Fling, My Forever

•Chapter 37•

Shawn Mendes
She just stared at me.
She didn't blink or move her eyes at all.
She looked like a statue.
It was scarier than if she would have yelled.
If she yelled then I would know what she was thinking.
But with her not moving a muscle, I had no idea what was going on through her head.
But I could guess it was nothing good.

"Elara I-"
"No. You don't get to talk right now." She said firmly and I shut my mouth quickly.
She folded her arms and I watched as her bottom lip started to quiver.
I closed my eyes out of pure regret as I saw the tears start to fall from her eyes onto her pale cheeks.
"So what you're telling me, is that you slept with someone else, while I was home, looking after our daughter and our home?" She whispered and I didn't even want to respond.
But that wasn't fair.
"Yes. I know how wrong it was. And I regretted it the moment it happened."
"Clearly not enough."
"What are you talking about?"
"If you regret it so damn much you wouldn't have done it in the first place. If you loved me you wouldn't have done it. If you love that little girl in there you wouldn't have done it. And yet, you did do it." She cried.

My heart fell.
It was the biggest mistake of my life.
But it didn't mean I loved Elara or Frances any less.
And that's what she didn't see.

"Elara I love you."
"Don't you dare say you love me. Don't you dare." She whispered and shook her head.
"But-"
"Was it fun huh? Better than me? Is that what it was?" She said with a fake grin.
I shook my head quickly as she spoke and stood up out of my chair.
I started to walk over to her but she put her hand up to me.
"Don't. Just don't touch me." She whispered before walking out of the kitchen.

I followed her out of the kitchen and watched on as she scooped up Frances and walked into Frances' bedroom.
Again all I could do was watch as Elara got Frances ready for bed.
I didn't want us to fight in front of our daughter.
It wasn't fair on her.

I went into Elara and I's bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed, my head in my hands.
I had royally fucked up.
Again.
I knew it wasn't right to do what I did and it was the truth that I regretted it the moment I did it.
I loved Elara more than I could say.

As she walked into the bedroom she closed the door before sliding down it and slumping on the floor.
I watched as she sighed and the tears built up in her eyes again.
"You left me. I'm exhausted and tired and you left." She sighed.
"Elara I wasn't thinking straight that day."
"I told you that I didn't invite him. I told you that and still you chose not to believe me." She said.
"I know. I know. And Agnes came to me the other day and told me what had happened and-"
"Agnes came to you?"
"She said how you were struggling and then shouted at me for being an asshole. She told me it was her that brought him." I explained.
"You are an asshole."
"Yes. Yes I am." I said and knelt down in front of her. 

She looked up at me with tired eyes and I gave her a sympathetic look.
"Even when you're tired you're beautiful."
"Still doesn't cover for you sleeping with someone." She sighed.
I cautiously took her hand in mine and ran my thumb over the back of it.
"I know. And it was so stupid of me. So fucking stupid."
"It was."
"But Elara I love you. I love you and Frances more than life itself." I said and she gave me a small smile.
"I know. But you do it again and I swear to god I will kill you."
"And don't I know it."

I opened my arms and she crawled forward until she had her arms and legs wrapped around me.
I held her close to my body and breathed deeply as she placed her face in the crook of my neck.

I held her as I stood up and walked over to our bed, placing her down lightly before climbing in next to her.
"Can I ask you something?" She asked as her eyes started to flutter closed.
"Of course you can."
"And youll tell me the truth?"
"Of course I will."
"Would you marry me?" She asked and I shuffled around as my eyes involuntarily widened.
"What?"
"Not now. But in the future. Could you see us getting married." She said and her eyes were now fully closed.
I thought to myself for a moment and smiled and started to stroke her hair.
"Yeah. Yeah I can see us getting married."
"Good. I love you."
"I love you too." I smiled and kissed her on her forehead as she snuggled into my side.
I sighed and smiled to myself.
I couldn't believe I had ever treated her badly.
She didn't deserve to be treated badly.
And I wouldn't do it again.
And I knew exactly how to prove that to her.