Lethal Obsession

30.

"You have to believe that you're better than the fountain of abuse that's been spewing hurt and pain at you. You just are." – Sara Li

"Let no one despair, even though in the darkest night the last star of hope may disappear."

— Friedrich Schiller.

"Stop setting yourself on fire to keep someone else warm."

"Here I am
Once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it
Can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes"

- Behind these hazel eyes – Kelly Clarkson

Chapter 30

The emotions that had finally surfaced the night before seemed to completely evaporate from me and only anger remained. Not sadness, not fear and certainly not love. I couldn't, nor did I want to understand, how he could, after what he did, appear in front of the door as if everything was perfectly fine. Apart from the obvious dark circles under his eyes and a bit disheveled hair, nothing in his appearance showed that he felt emotionally bad for even a single moment. His clothes were so tight that the tattoos covering every inch of his body could be seen through his white shirt. The blood-red roses in his hands looked like sin, and he was forbidden fruit. Still, I only saw red.

He opened his mouth to say something, but I didn't wait for him to do so. I grabbed the door and tried to slam it with all my might in his face. However, he knew me too well not to anticipate my actions. Before I could close the door completely, he placed one foot to prevent me from doing so. Any normal person would probably get seriously hurt, but he didn't make a single sound.

I tried to put pressure again, but it didn't work. He pushed the door hard, completely opening it. The expression on his face became somewhat gloomy, but that didn't stop him from going inside and starting to approach me. Seeing that, I started walking backward, wanting to make as much space between us as possible. That action of mine seemed to wake him from whatever trance he was in and he stopped, not moving an inch.

I raised an eyebrow and crossed my arms over my chest, irritably waiting for him to say what he wanted and leave my life once and for all. I could only imagine what I looked like. Huge bags under my eyes, tousled hair, clothes in an awful state. I was probably a sight to be seen. However, at that point, I didn't care. I felt such rage burning inside me I was afraid I would burst.

"Love-" He started, but I interrupted him.

"Don't call me that."

"Tara-" He tried one more time, but I interrupted him again.

"You know what? It's best that you don't call me at all," I snapped.

His expression betrayed surprise. I probably would be too. I had never treated him like that, but the moment I saw him aroused such a disgusting feeling in me that the only thing I could think of was my arms around his neck slowly taking away every atom of his life energy.

"I'm sor-"

"Shut up! Don't finish the fucking sentence!" I screamed with all my might, to which he recoiled.

He finally noticed the redness on my face and the crazy look I was using to stare him down. He closed his eyes and very slowly opened them again, looking directly at mine. There was something bright in his dark pupils, but this time, it didn't make me weak.