Lethal Obsession

23.

"As in all abusive relationships, the abused mistakenly assumes the kindest version of the abuser is the real one." ― Chris Holm

"Was there ever a war where only one side bled?" ― George R.R. Martin

"Love is like fever; it comes and goes without the will having any part of the process." ― Stendhal

"...I can smell your fear
The only reason that I'm here
Is to wreak havoc
Everybody prayin' that I'll change, yeah
Maybe one day but tomorrow I'll be back at it
'Cause bad habits they die hard
We live fast we die hard
Go against me you'll die hard..."

- Skylar Gray – Wreak havoc

Chapter 23

The night was glorious. The rain was bucketing down hard and showed no sign of letting up. Thunder was booming like cannon fire, breaking through every sound defense there was. As gloomy as the scene was, it was just as beautiful, in some unusual, different way. Raindrops hit the window glass hard, creating a magical view of nature going mad. I felt peace watching the storm raging outside as if it was drawing energy from the one that was happening inside me.

A strong thunderbolt made me move away from the window. I glanced at the bed where Mateo was sleeping. He looked so calm as he swam through the land of dreams. The blanket barely covered half of his body, reaching to the lower part of his stomach. His torso was naked, and you could see all the tattoos that adorned that part of his skin, including the latest one he dedicated to me. He was beautiful. He really was. Stunning, dashing, bewitching, divine. Many words could describe human beauty and yet, it seemed like none of them would be enough for Mateo. While watching his calm, sleepy face, I couldn't help but feel lust flowing through my body. However, the situation from a few days ago would always found its way back to my mind whenever my thoughts and feelings wander in that direction. I kept asking myself what had been his reason for what he had done. He had never given me any kind of explanation for that night, he only begged me to forgive him and admitted how wrong he was. He felt guilty and sorry, that much was obvious. The tears he had shed couldn't be faked, and why would they? If he didn't want me, if he didn't love me, he wouldn't cry so much, he wouldn't regret it. He had promised me that he would never hurt me again, that he would treat me the way I deserved, but had that really been true? It had to be, right? He told me he loved me. We all had our weaknesses and we all made mistakes, and he sincerely repented for his own, I wanted to believe that he deserved to be given another chance. He wouldn't hurt me again. He wouldn't.

Rationalization is a bitch.

"Babygirl? Why are you awake?" Mateo's sleepy voice made me turn my gaze away from his tattoos covered chest and move it on his face. I smiled. He looked very cute as he rubbed his eyelids to drive sleep away, like some young, innocent child. It was really strange to compare Mateo with something innocent.

"I couldn't sleep," I replied, to which he nodded and told me to come closer to him. I took another quick look at the storm outside and headed for the bed. I lied down right next to him, resting my head on his chest. He took my left hand in one of his, playing with my fingers, and used the other one to stroke my hair. I sighed, finally feeling some pleasure as well as happiness. Slowly I began to believe in the things I was convincing myself, I began to believe him. He regretted it. That was the only thing that mattered.

"Princess?" he brought my hand to his lips and kissed it gently.

"Hm?" the steady beating of his heart was slowly leading me to the dreamland.