Scars

Part 1

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5 years later:

Alexis' POV:

"Why are you so mad?" Nichole asked.

"I'm not mad", I said, stomping out of the kitchen, and going upstairs to our bedroom.

She followed behind me.  "Well, obviously you are.  Because you're barely even talking to me."

"Just shut up", I said, as I laid down on the bed on my stomach, with my arms crossed, as I hid my face.

We had now been married for five years.  I was now 25.   And Nichole was now 28.  And even though we had a healthy marriage, over the last five years... something happened.  

And what that was... was life.  Life happened.  Reality had set in.  And I guess you could say, the honeymoon was over.

We had our problems just like any couple.  But we also had problems that were unique to us.  And to our situation.  And instead of things getting better and working things out, things just seemed to keep getting worse.  

And I think it was mainly, for the most part, because of where we both were in our lives.

I had long ago quit modeling, deciding it just wasn't what I wanted.  For many reasons.  But the main reason was it was all too complicated.  The expectations had been so high.  I felt like I always had to perfect, something that I was far from.   Not to mention, that it was a cutthroat industry, and so extremely competitive.  And honestly, I wasn't any match for that.  But what was even more so, was that I had begun to feel like I was being put more and more in the spotlight.  And I didn't like that.  At all.  It just wasn't me.  It was a feeling that I completely hated.  So, in short, for me, it was just too much.  So in the end, I made the decision to get out of modeling all together.

I had changed course, and I was now a third grade art teacher.  A job that I absolutely loved.  I enjoyed working with children so much.  I adored each and everyone of my students.  And to be blessed enough to be the one to open their eyes to the world of art, which was so dear to my heart, meant the world to me.  So yes, for me, I felt like I had definitely made the right career choice.

But Nikki, on the other hand, had stayed in the field of modeling.  And she was now, the senior photographer, having gotten several promotions over the years.  She absolutely excelled at photography.  She had a natural talent for it.  In fact, she was regarded by many, as one of top photographers in the world.  And the agency itself, had expanded tremendously since my days of being part of it.  It was now an international company, and had models throughout the world. So yes.  Much had changed.

And what did all this mean? For me? For us?  It meant, that now that the agency was international, and Nikki was their top photographer, it meant she now traveled all over the world.  A lot.  And for long amounts of time.

And needless to say, her constant traveling was beginning to cause problems.  It was weighing on us. Putting stress on our marriage.  And taking a toll on our relationship.  

And goddamnit.  Sometimes her traveling just plain pissed me off.   Especially when we had plans.

"No, I want to talk about this."

"Talk about what?  What's there to talk about?" I said, sulking.

She let out a loud sigh of frustration.  "Jesus Alexis.  You act like this is my fault.  Like I have some kind of control over it."