Say when

19

Meredith opened her eyes feeling a pounding feeling in her head... she tasted something at the tip of her lips and spit it out... she sat up pulling the pile of feather boa's off her and stood up on wobbly legs...

She looked around the closet in the dressing room and then down at her seeing that she was in her lace black bra and panties... she had no idea where the rest of her clothing was nor how she got there...

She shook her head and grabbed her robe wrapping it around her body, still squinting a little... she stopped at the door startled a little to see Derek sitting at her vanity, he was stretched out his feet propping him up on her desk as he leaned back in the chair flipping through a magazine...

He looked up at her raising his brow...

"You come back to earth yet?" he asked... suddenly the foggy memories of earlier that night flooded back to her and her hand flew over her face as she cringed..

"Oh god!" she cringed.. he sat up sitting up straight in his chair and tossed the magazine on the vanity..

"What did you take." He said firmly with a stern expression... she looked at him gulping and slightly shook her head...

"It was nothing." She replied...

"It was something!" he replied feeling his voice rise "You tried to jump out of the three story window."

She felt a knot grow in her stomach and she dropped her eyes to the vanity desk and chewed on her lip nervously...

"Ok." She replied "I get it.. I'll have my things out of here within an hour."

She turned to walk into the closet when he stood up and grabbed her pulling her back around to face him...

"I don't want to fire you, I just want to know why you got high." He asked...

She looked at him ready to protest when she saw past his hardened expression and saw the softness and concern in his eyes, something she'd never seen in anyone much less a man before.. she felt her inward pride starting to cave and she let out a sigh as tears started to pool in her eyes...

"I..." she whispered "I told you about my mother... and I... I thought... that it would be better than sitting at home on my birthday, alone... and miserable... realizing that no one out there cares that its my birthday... its nothing, I only did it because I was having a bad day ok, I'm just... I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too." He whispered.. lifting her chin with his finger "I'm sorry we had a fight, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, and that you felt you had to get high to take away the pain..."

"How could you have taken away that kind of pain."

"I cant." He replied "But I can relate... my mother still hasn't forgiven me for my brother's death... so in a sense, July 17th is the loneliest day of the year for me too... people not caring that I've made it another year without being killed or killing myself... I cant take away your pain, but I can relate."

She felt taken back by his offer, she wasn't used to someone caring, someone being there, she wasn't used to even what they had, had...

"Why did you stay with me?" she asked softly...

"You mean other than making sure you didn't try out your non-existent wings?" he chuckled... she rolled her eyes unamused... he reached up cupping her delicate face with his hands and looked softly into her eyes "Because, whether you choose to believe it or not... I care about you Mer.. I was grumpy and hopeless.. you gave me something to smile about again... I had a dark cloud over my life and you... you're my sunshine."

She felt her breath taken away, she'd never been talked to that way.. and it scared the hell out of her but she didn't dare run.. he leaned in and softly brushed his lips against hers elicting a tingling sensation between them.. he ran his tongue lightly across her upper lip beckoning entry and it was granted...

He enveloped her sweet lips into his as his tongue delved into her mouth meeting its mate and softly sucked on her sweet skin... he pulled back giving her a soft and satisfied smile... he gave her a pat on the back end and gave her a wink...

"Now go get some coffee and get to work."

She smiled as she watching him walk out of the room satisfied that she was ok now... she felt a flutter in her stomach feeling a different, better kind of high...

She turned around sitting at her vanity rummaging through her things trying to think of what she was going to do that day... completely unaware of the person that was watching her, and had the entire scene.