I can't do this anymore

Chapter 7 - i just want it gone

Mapi's pov:

Me and Ale were leaving today. I was happy to be going home but wished Car was coming. I knew that she would be back though. She just wanted to be with her brother for as long as she could and I didn't blame her. We were going to see Marc first and then to the airport. Me and Lex had a game in 3 days and needed to be ready.
'Maps, levántate dormilón tenemos lugares para estar y gente para ver' Car sang at me putting on a brave face for me. (Maps get up sleepyhead we have places to be and people to see)
'nooo cinco minutos más por favor' i wined back very comfy in the sheets. (Nooo five more minutes pleaseee)
'no te levantas' she laughed at me as she did so and walked out. (Nope up you get)
'brusca' I called after her as I started to get out of the bed. (Rude)

It was half 8 by the time we were all sat around the island eating. I was sitting there while everyone was talking in English so didn't really understand. But I could see the look of concern on Ale's face whenever she looked at Car.

Me and Ale said our goodbyes to the 2 Chelsea players and as I hugged them I whispered
'gracias y cuidala' into their ears even though I knew they didn't know what I was saying. (thank you and look after her)

We got into Cars car ( saying that always made me laugh) and we chatted away and laughed about old memories. I could see Car's eyes watering as we talked and I could see how much it hurt her to leave. I could feel my own eyes watering. That girl was my family. My best friend. My little sister. She was such a big part of my life and I will miss her so much. It will be strange not seeing her every day and it will hurt. But life will still move on just with us being in different places. I worried for Car. I was scared for her that the nightmares would come back or the panic attacks. This time me or Ale wouldn't be there. I knew Ale would struggle with the separation as well. They were always with each other and you could see how close they were. You could see how much they loved, cared for and admired each other. It was a relationship everyone wished they had. They were the definition of platonic soulmates.

Alexia's pov: ( Spanish in slashes again x)

'CAR LEX MAPI' a voice screamed and i was sure that you could have heard it from downstairs.
/'hey superstar you okay today'/ Car said sitting next to her brother in the bed as he nestled himself into her. Me and Mapi sat on the chairs next to them .
/'honestly?'/ he asked looking up at her
/'yeah go on then'/ she sighed out as she drew circles on his arm with her finger.
/'I'm not doing good girls I don't feel strong or hopeful anymore it just hurts me all the time and I just want it gone'/ he said to us not crying or anything just smiling softly at us.
/'don't cry Cars'/ he said as he wiped the girl next to him tears away.
/'soon I will go and it's okay because it hurts to live now and soon I won't be able to do it. But you have so many people around you who love you and who will help you.'/ he said as us three girls were in tears.

The rest of the 2 hours were spent chatting and just enjoying each other's company. It was dawning on me that this would be one of my last interactions with the boy. Although we weren't as close as me and Car we were still family. He was a big part of my life and my little brother. He was a joy to be around and had such a positive outlook on everything. So much that even though he was dyeing I had never seen him cry over it. He seemed at peace with the fact that soon he would be gone. It broke my heart to see as he was so young and still had a long life to live. It hurt even more to see Car in such a state. To see the girl who was my daughter in tears and so broken over something. She cares for her brother so much and everything she did was for him. They were both so selfless and too young to had gone through what they did. I admired them for holding on though everything.

We were soon ushered out by the nurses and me and Mapi broke down in his and Cars arms. I was going to miss him so so much.

We were in the car driving to the airport with Car driving me next to her and Maps in the back.
/'so do you know who your first game is against'/ I asked Car trying to take her mind off the fact that we were leaving.
/'nope I'm not sure yet but I know that Jill and Daan and Viv are all at Arsenal and Jill has asked to meet up and some time so that will be fun!'/ she replied back her face lighting up as she mentioned the Dutch girls. It was evident how much she cared for them and also how they cared for her back. I smiled knowing there would be people here for her and in her corner.
/'I have also heard rumours that you have 2 Spanish girls coming to England as well'/ Mapi said from the back trying to sound all mysterious. But she just ended up sounding like a dick.
Me and Car laughed hard at her for a good 5 minutes.
/'shit was it that bad'/ she said in mock shock.
/'yes Maps it really was now tell us who and where'/ Car said wiping her eyes from laughing to much.
/' well first Leila is moving to Man City'/ she said
/'yep that's true'/ I said popping the p
/'what how do you know'/ Lex said looking at me with suspicion.
/'I have my ways'/ I said imitating Mapi's mysterious voice. We all burst out laughing at this.