A School Apocalypse

Chapter 23

Edit: June 30th, 2017.

"You can't go by yourself," Declan mutters in my ear. I sigh.

"Why are you even here with me?" I snap. "Go away."

"And let you get yourself killed? No thanks." He replies with an eye roll. I resist one myself.

"I am perfectly capable of handling myself, thank you very much." I argue, walking away from him, but he pulls me back.

"There's no doubt you are." He presses. "Think realistically, though, Alex. It's more dangerous being alone. You don't have anyone to watch your back."

"I'm better off by myself, Declan," I say exasperatedly. "That's what you don't understand. I can't do this, whatever this is. I can't. I'm not one who will not blame themselves if something bad happens, alright? At least if I fault I know who to blame it on."

"Then that's all the more reason to stay around!" He protests. "Why leave when you're going to blame yourself anyways?"

Has he not understood anything that has come out of my mouth since he approached me?

"Why stick around to scare myself even more by watching more living humans die?" I retort.

"You're really stubborn, you know that?" He asks rhetorically.

"Tell me something I don't know."

"You'll regret leaving." He says easily.

"Look, cute-Australian-dude-who-doesn't-know-how-to-leave-people-alone, you caught me. Yeah, I love those guys. To death. Literally. But an apocalypse? C'mon, that's different. You can survive a bullet. You can't survive a bite from a zombie without being amputated. And I'd rather have all my limbs, and I think being by myself is good. I survived a lot of shit since this took place: I watched our apartments get taken over and lost 6 innocent kindergarteners, followed by other... acquaintances. Sure, that doesn't seem like much, but it tallies up, right? I... I even watched my best friend die right in front of me. Then I lived in a house outside the city for a while, before seeing my two friends again, and not a single walker caused havoc for me, being alone."

I start getting flashbacks and feel a swarm of tears coming. Tears, tears, tears. You're full of them today.

"I think I'm better off by myself if it's just me. I don't have to watch my friends die... then blame it on myself all over again." He just stares at me. Not saying anything. He looks into my eyes, and I feel a burning sation on my cheek. If I wasn't so cautious, I could have easily mistaken my nervous, small red tinge as a slap across the face.

"You're so close to the end, though. We all are. You've been with these people since this started, right? That's motivation itself. You have made it this far, I think you can make it a little longer. Plus, your friends need you. And you may not act like it now, but I think you need them, too. I know what it's like to lose people you were close to, I lost dozens this month. It's a horrible feeling. But you stayed strong, Alex. You're even helping us, and you don't even know us. But we need you too, we're struggling living like this, and I mean really bad. Summer and Noah, they can't do anything involving those things without freaking out. My group is just a mess. We barely made it alive. But you... maybe you and your group can help. Helping us get through this fiasco. We all feel safe with you guys, no matter how weird that sounds to my ears considering we're all the same age, but we've never felt as safe. That's saying something. Alex. Stay. Please don't back down, we need you more than ever right now." He grabs my hand, and squeezes gently. Why are you letting a stranger touch you?