Military Girlfriend

Chapter 27

      Chapter 27:  " Jay's Pov"

      I watched as her face turns from anger to complete devastation, her beautiful face scrunches up with so much pain it literally makes my heart hurt to see that shes in this state. Yet most of all that I have caused this pain for her. I run my hands through my hair and tug at the roots, why am I such an idiot? I take a step towards her, yearning to hold her but she comes back to reality as she takes four steps back.

"Baby please." I let my hand drop at my side, I know there's no way to talk her down from this state of mind. She surprises me by laughing, but it's not the laugh that makes me smile or my heart lighter. She laughs with bitterness, like she just put all the puzzle pieces together. My heart aches, can this really be the end of us?

"You kill me Jay, you really do." She shakes her head at me, and when she looks up at me, I look her in the eyes. They don't glow with love. It's a border line of hatred, and disappointment. A combination that can kill even the strongest of men. I don't know what to say back to her so I just shift my eyes to the floor.

"You tell me how much it hurt you to come back and see her with someone else while you were away fighting a war, but here you are doing the exact same thing to me, and for what? For standing by your side, for loving you with everything I could? The Military sure snagged a good guy to fight for our country, you don't even know what loyalty is!" She spits out at me, which is another ding to the heart that stings like hell. I know I deserve it though so I welcome these words.

"I'm so sorry baby, please I realize it was a mistake. I don't love her Shay, I love you." I'm on the verge of tears, trying to find any way to make this better.

"You know what Jay-" She whispers as her voice shakes to push the words out. "I've learned that this was a mistake, we were a mistake."

We were a mistake, We were a mistake. I play the words in my head like a record that's been scratched and has been stuck on repeat.

No, she doesn't mean it, she can't.

"You don't mean that Shay, we can work through it. We will find a way." I plead with her, trying to find hope some where in her empty eyes. Trying to find hope in myself as I push the words out and shake my head from this nightmare.

"But I do Jay, I really do mean it. This is a betrayal I don't think I can get over." Her lip begins to quiver and she bits down on it to stop me from seeing her unfold.

"I didn't mean to Shay. Please forgive me, Shaylee please it was a mistake!" I begin to get frustrated, but not at her. At myself, my voice rises as my head gets heavy and i'm standing here confused. We were perfect, we were fine until I had to throw a monkey wrench into this. I'm such an idiot. I start saying everything, anything to fix the situation. Hell i'm not even making since as my eyes gloss over with tears and I find myself repeating the same thing over and over again.

I can barley see her through the tears but she's no longer looking at me, she focuses on something down the street as I come undone. I blink rapidly which allow the tears to stream down my face, it allows me to see a little clearer and when I go to look at her again, shes gone. I look up to the front door to see the screen door shutting and I take off after her.

"Shaylee, wait!" I yell as I rush pass the thresh hold and to our room that were staying in. I get about two steps in and Josh puts his arms around me, stopping my pursuit.

"Let me go Josh, please I have to explain to her everything." I try looking over his shoulder to catch a glimpse of her but instead I see his wife rushing to my girlfriends side as she closes the door behind her.

"I think it's best you let her cool off Jay, she's really upset."

"I appreciate your advice but please let me go in there, she has to know its her I love. Please!"

"I can't let you in there man."

I feel vulnerable and annoyed that he won't let me fix what I broke.

"Shaylee please, let's talk about this!" I try yelling, having some hope that she would open the door but instead I hear it lock and my hope flickers out like a candle.

"Just give her a little time Jay." Josh tries to reason with me again, so instead I sit down on their carpet stairs and rest my head in my hands.

"I messed up Josh, really bad and i'm afraid i'll lose her for good."

"If you guys are meant to be then you'll find a way around it."

"No you don't understand, I kissed Jade." The words weigh a thousand pounds on my tongue and it hurts me more saying them out loud. I hear Josh take in a breathe as he tries to find words to say.

"I think you just need to give her time man, she will come around when she gets her head wrapped around this whole thing."

"I don't have a lot of time Josh, I go back into the Military in two weeks."

"Maybe it's best that you are, it will give her time to think about all of this on her own."

I hear the door unlock and I immediately stand up searching for my girl, yet instead i'm greeted with Josh's wife and a bag in her hand. I take a closer look and I realize it's Shaylees's duffle bag.

"I'm taking her home, i'll be back in a day or so." She gives Josh a kiss and goes to her son's room to say goodbye to him. Moments later Shaylee appears from the door, her eyes red from crying. She doesn't even look my way as she glides pass me and out the door. It takes a couple seconds for reality to catch up with me that she's really leaving. I run out the door and pull at the handle on the car to find it already locked. Josh's wife climbs inside from the driver door and backs out of the driveway. I run after the car before it speeds off down the road with the only girl i've ever loved inside.

I curse the world out as I sit on the side of the road with my knees pulled to my chest, the tears fall and I don't even care anymore if it isn't considered "Manly"

My whole entire world just collapsed, and it's all my fault.

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A/N: I'm so sorry if this isn't that great, its one in the morning here and i'm super tired but i'm leaving for vacation tomorrow, well I guess you could say today and i'll be gone for a while. Plus i'm still kind of sick, but thank you guys so much for the support on the last chapter, all your comments made me laugh and smile. :)

Xoxo

       Midnight_Writer97 :)